You Won’t Believe Why Texas Is Grabbing Bitcoin Like a Golden Goose!

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Hold onto your hats, because America’s states are now treating Bitcoin the way Augustus Gloop treated Willy Wonka’s chocolate river—diving in headfirst and hoping not to drown! Just as the dust settled from Arizona’s surprise leap into the Bitcoin bonanza, here comes Texas, boots and all, strutting in with the grand SB 21 bill wiggling like a prize sausage. And where in all this chaos is Donald Trump? Oh, he’s there too, probably tossing gold-plated “Make Bitcoin Great Again” hats to the cheering crowd.

Meanwhile, the other states peer jealously over the fence, poking at their boring old cash and squealing, “But Mom, can I have Bitcoin too?” It’s turning into a full-blown race, with governors of every shade and shape elbowing their way to the front. New Hampshire and Arizona have made things official: one’s a Republican, the other a Democrat, and both apparently believe Satoshi Nakamoto is the adult in the room. With Texas now leaping aboard the crypto express, crypto wrangler Gary Cardone couldn’t resist commenting:

“GAME THEORY IGNITED! Tic Tok. We have one clean decision by NH, then reversal from Arizona Gov, next is Texas who hasn’t done anything Big since Big Oil and Gas!”

Florida, meanwhile, quietly slips away from the wild dance, dumping its own Bitcoin dreams like a disappointing trick-or-treater sent home early. Arizona nearly followed, but at the last minute, lawmakers performed a dazzling pirouette and signed House Bill 2749, showering Bitcoin with bipartisan confetti. The ever-enthusiastic Jeff Weninger had this to say:

“Digital assets aren’t the future—they’re the present. This law ensures Arizona doesn’t leave value sitting on the table and puts us in a position to lead the country in how we secure, manage, and ultimately benefit from abandoned digital currency. It’s exactly the kind of policy we should be leading on—modern, precise, and built with an understanding of where technology and finance are heading.”

Now, as for Bitcoin itself, it’s eyeing that $100,000 milestone the way Veruca Salt eyed golden eggs—greedily, relentlessly, and with the confidence of a digital peacock. After a teeny-tiny nudge (just a measly $3,000 🚀) from China’s trillion-yuan monetary fireworks, and a curiously static Federal Reserve keeping interest rates flatter than pancakes, Bitcoin is slouching toward a brand-new high score. Will it break $100K? Will states start handing out Bitcoin with school lunches? Will Texas finally outdo its oil and gas glory days? Stay tuned—this story is nuttier than Willy Wonka’s factory, and twice as unpredictable! 🤑🍫💸

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2025-05-08 08:53