You Won’t Believe Why Bitcoin Might Hit $1 Million Thanks to Recession Fears

So Jerome Powell dropped the ultimate economic mic on April 16: stagflation is coming, which is just a fancy way of saying “we’re getting higher prices and slower growth”—basically, your wallet’s about to lose weight while your patience gains wrinkles. 🤡

He warned that the Fed’s job is like juggling flaming chainsaws blindfolded—balancing max jobs with min inflation, two goals that apparently hate each other more than cats and cucumbers.

Meanwhile, the New York Fed’s recession crystal ball says there’s a 56% chance America’s economy will throw a pity party by July. RSVP yourself!

Why This Makes Bitcoin the Cool Kid on the Block (Chain)

BlackRock’s crypto guru Robbie Mitchnick told Yahoo Finance that recessions might actually be Bitcoin’s best frenemies. Because, surprise, recessions bring the kind of chaos that makes Bitcoin’s price do the money version of the wave.

“Bitcoin loves long liquidity—aka more government spending, bigger deficits, and skinny interest rates—basically recession season’s greatest hits.”

So if the Fed’s nightmare stagflation becomes real, Jack Dorsey’s $1 million Bitcoin prophecy by 2030 might stop sounding like sci-fi and start sounding like your future retirement plan. 🎢💸

Here’s the 411 on how this blockchain magic might unfold:

1. Bitcoin Is the Tariff-Free Rebel

“There are no tariffs on Bitcoin.”
— Michael Saylor, Twitter philosopher, April 3, 2025

Unlike rusty old steel or whatever Trump was mad about last week, Bitcoin floats in a glorious, borderless cyberspace where no tariffs dare follow. eToro’s analyst Javier Molina points out that Tesla, Apple, and Google are flailing around more wildly thanks to tariffs than Bitcoin ever will.

Translation: While America’s busy slapping tariffs on everything from imported socks to steel, Bitcoin just shrugged and kept grabbing popcorn 🍿 in the corner.

2. Governments and Big Players Hoarding Bitcoin Like It’s Toilet Paper in 2020

Turns out the US government wants a Bitcoin stash like a doomsday prepper, and the rest of the world’s following suit. Binance is chatting up world powers about creating official Bitcoin piggy banks, while some former Trump folks floated the idea of using tariff dollars to fill the national crypto vault.

Basically, whales and suits are gobbling up Bitcoin like it’s the last slice of pizza at a party—scarce and oh-so-desirable.

3. Fed Rate Cuts? Bitcoin Throws a Party 🎉

Simply Bitcoin summed it up expertly: “Yes.”

When the Fed slashes interest rates—like in the financial crisis or pandemic-era freak-out—Bitcoin zooms. We’re talking price jumps from pennies to actual money levels. So if Powell gets trigger-happy again with rate cuts, Bitcoin buyers might just break out the confetti.

4. America’s Deficits: Rocket Fuel for Bitcoin

The Congressional Budget Office says Uncle Sam will keep borrowing like it’s an extreme shopping spree, with debt possibly hitting 156% of GDP by 2055. More borrowing means more money-printing, which usually means less faith in dollars and a party invite for Bitcoin.

So when the government spends like there’s no tomorrow, Bitcoin’s value tends to moonwalk upwards.

5. Gresham’s Law, But Make It Crypto

“Bad money drives out good from circulation.”

In the 16th century, Thomas Gresham noticed people would spend the cheap coins and hoard the shiny ones. Fast forward to today: the Fed prints dollars like they’re going out of style, but Bitcoin—hard to mine and limited—gets hoarded like grandma’s secret cookie recipe.

Bitcoin flexed a 37% gain over the last year, while the Nasdaq was doing… okay, at 4.39%. Looks like the cool kids prefer their currency digital and scarce.

2025-04-19 19:47