If you asked Bitcoin how its weekend went, it would probably shrug, sip a cup of digital tea, and mutter something about “that $95,000 level” like a retired wizard who misplaced his staff. Yes, the great bull cavalry charged bravely at the $95K fortress, only to be met by bears wearing high-visibility vests and holding ‘No Entry’ picket signs. Result? Bitcoin retreated, grumbling, exactly one grand poorer.
The rest of the crypto kingdom didn’t fare much better. Most altcoins decided that today was a lovely shade of red, but Litecoin led the charge. Or rather, led the plunge. After the US SEC announced it needed a little more time to consider an ETF application—for what is time to regulatory wizards anyway?—LTC fainted quite dramatically, losing 7% and requiring smelling salts (and maybe a support zone). Someone somewhere probably made a joke about ‘lite’ falling weightlessly, but, as usual, nobody laughed.
BTC’s Attempt at Athleticism
Once upon a Wednesday, Bitcoin dusted itself off from yet another $93,000 stumble, did a little warm-up, and sprinted above $97K. It barely had time to bask in the applause before it eyed that legendary $100,000 mark—you know, the round number that haunts traders’ dreams and memes alike. Reality, however, appeared with a wet sock and a calendar. Bitcoin promptly lost steam and invented a new dance it calls “The Gradual Decline,” eventually finding itself reciting motivational quotes somewhere just above $94,000.
Its market cap, meanwhile, is stuck at $1.870 trillion, which sounds impressive right up until you realize it just means Bitcoin can buy several small countries or one-and-a-half Silicon Valleys. Dominance over the altcoins: 62%. That’s either a badge of honour or a diplomatic incident, depending who you ask.
Litecoin’s Dramatic Performance 🎭
The SEC, in true bureaucratic fashion, decided to treat the Litecoin ETF application the way one treats a mystery meat pie: “Let’s leave it for another month and see if it sprouts.” The news caused Litecoin to drop like a lead balloon at an airship convention, currently clinging just above $80 for dear life and hoping nobody sneezes.
The rest of the altcoin roster—XRP, DOGE, ETH, ADA, SUI, LINK, LEO, XLM, AAVE, APT—wasn’t feeling very lively either, taking hits of up to 5%. If you like numbers falling more gracefully, BNB, TAO, and XMR managed some tepid upward motion, probably just to be contrarian. Total crypto market cap shed another $40 billion, a number that makes everyone say “oof” simultaneously in twelve languages.
In conclusion: Bears had a buffet, Litecoin took a swan dive, Bitcoin tried yoga and pulled a metaphorical hamstring, and somewhere, the SEC is sharpening its pencils for another round of ‘Undecided Meetings’. Tune in next week, or just check your wallet and scream. 🐻📉🍵
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2025-05-06 12:49