Trump Slays the Debanking Dragon! 🏦⚔️💰

In a move that would make even the most cynical wizard raise an eyebrow, President Trump has waved his executive wand and declared, “Thou shalt not choke the financial lifeblood of industries, lest ye face the wrath of the Orange One!” 🧙♂️✨ Crypto enthusiasts, who’ve been treated like trolls under the bridge for years, are now dancing in the streets-or at least, tweeting furiously. But beware! Legal analysts whisper that regulators might still don their sneakiest cloaks and target individual companies under the guise of “risk management.” 🕵️♂️💼

Operation Chokepoint 2.0: Cancelled Faster Than a Discworld Footnote

While Operation Chokepoint was never officially confirmed-much like the existence of a certain Ankh-Morporkian god-rumors spread like a bad case of the Squibs in early 2023. Venture capitalist Nic Carter and his merry band of crypto crusaders claimed U.S. regulators were secretly pressuring banks to ghost crypto firms. Account closures? Check. Regulatory warnings? Check. Heightened scrutiny? Double check. All because Silvergate, Signature, and Silicon Valley Bank decided to take a dive. 🏦💥

Enter Trump’s anti-debanking order, the hero the crypto community didn’t know it needed. The main decree reads:

“It is the policy of the United States that no American should be denied access to financial services because of their constitutionally or statutorily protected beliefs, affiliations, or political views. Banking decisions must be made on the basis of individualized, objective, and risk-based analyses-not on whether you’ve got a funny hat or a strange accent.” 🎩🧐

This order isn’t just about crypto-though they’re celebrating like they’ve found the lost treasure of the Dwarfs. It also takes a swipe at the Obama-era Operation Chokepoint, which allegedly targeted political opponents under the guise of fighting fraud. Because nothing says “fairness” like a government initiative with a name straight out of a spy novel. 🕵️♂️🔍

With the so-called Biden-era Operation Chokepoint 2.0, the crypto crowd claimed hedge funds and other organizations were being debanked faster than a wizard can say “Expendable.” Often, these poor souls were left in the dark about why they were being kicked to the curb. Some were told it was because of crypto. Coinbase’s Chief Legal Officer, Paul Grewal, pointed out that businesses not involved in crypto were living their best lives. 🤷♂️💼

Carter, Sen. Cynthia Lummis, Paul Grewal, and crypto advocate Caitlin Long decided to shine a light on these shenanigans, armed with documents obtained via the Freedom of Information Act. Because nothing says “transparency” like forcing the government to cough up its secrets. 📜🔦

Soon, the issue was brought to the attention of the government. SEC chairman Jerome Powell criticized the FDIC’s guidelines, Trump grumbled about debanking, and Vice President JD Vance declared Operation Chokepoint 2.0 dead in May 2025. Caitlin Long, ever the realist, pointed out that Vance was jumping the gun-the tools targeting crypto were still very much alive. 🧟♂️💳

Notable Reactions: A Cast of Characters Worthy of a Pratchett Novel

Caitlin Long, ever the astute observer, noted the order has “hidden gems” and praised the White House for realizing federal banking regulators are about as trustworthy as a noble in Ankh-Morpork. 👑🤨

Long highlights that the order creates an overseer entity, the Small Business Administration, to keep banks in line. Because if there’s one thing we’ve learned, it’s that you can’t trust the Federal Reserve, the OCC, or the FDIC to play nice. 🕵️♂️🔍

And who’s heading the SBA? None other than Kelly Loeffler, a bitcoiner. So, crypto businesses can breathe a little easier-for now. But the law doesn’t mention “crypto” once, focusing instead on the broad concept of “politicized or unlawful debanking.” Will this be misused? Only time will tell. 🕰️🤔

Nic Carter, ever the skeptic, pointed out the order’s lack of precision. How can we tell if a bank fired a client for political reasons or because they were just plain unprofitable? 🏦💸

Carter references Cato’s Nick Anthony, who distinguished between governmental and operational debanking. The former is when the government pressures banks to deny services based on politics; the latter is when banks make business decisions, like cutting ties with clients who can’t pay or cause shareholder protests. 🏦🤝

According to Carter, the order leaves room for politically motivated debanking disguised as operational decisions. His solution? More transparency and accountability. Because nothing scares a bank like having to explain itself. 🏦📢

While Sen. Lummis has declared victory, Carter remains cautious. Banks, he says, should be able to close accounts but must be transparent about why. Remove the “confidential supervisory information” seal, he argues, and let the sunlight in. ☀️🔍

So, while the crypto community celebrates, the saga of debanking continues. Will Trump’s order be the silver bullet, or just another footnote in the annals of financial intrigue? Only the Great A’Tuin knows for sure. 🐢🌌

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2025-08-10 03:27