
Ah, the eternal dance of the markets! Tom Lee, that modern-day soothsayer of stocks, proclaims with the gravity of a man foretelling the apocalypse that 2026 shall be a year of joy, depression, and a rally-a trifecta of emotional turmoil for the souls tethered to their portfolios. 🤑😢🚀
In his latest oration on the altar of CNBC, the high priest of Fundstrat research predicts a tempestuous beginning, a maelstrom of uncertainty, before the markets, like a penitent sinner, find their way back to the green pastures of profit. 🌪️💸
“Compressed into one year, it will be joy, depression, and a rally,” he intones, his voice dripping with the weight of prophecy. “Just as last year, 2025, began in the depths of despair, only to ascend to a glorious finale. April was the nadir… This year, the market shall test the mettle of the new Fed, and fear shall grip the hearts of men.” 🦹♂️💔
Yet, in the midst of this financial Götterdämmerung, Lee finds reason for hope. “The tariffs are ‘anniversarying,’ the Fed is cutting, and the ISM may finally rise above 50-a beacon of light in the darkness. We are optimistic, particularly about the laggards, like energy, which we crown as one of our top sector picks this year.” 🛢️✨
And let us not forget the Magnificent 7, those titans of industry, who shall continue to churn out earnings growth like Sisyphus pushing his boulder uphill. “The financials and small caps shall also rise,” Lee declares, “a symphony of sectors where much could go right.” 🎻📈
“Earnings will soar even higher,” he prophesies, “and other sectors shall re-rate, while the Mag 7 tracks their earnings growth, pulling the overall [price to earnings] down.” A grand finale, indeed, for a year of such dramatic flux. 🎭📉
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2026-01-06 11:32