This Billion-Dollar Bitcoin Bonanza Will Make Your Wallet Giggle! 🤡

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Oh, gather ‘round, you curious lot, for MicroStrategy isn’t just dabbling in Bitcoin—they’re gobbling it up like a ravenous giant with a never-ending sweet tooth! In the year 2025, by the 20th day of April (mark your calendars!), they had snagged a whopping 6,556 shiny Bitcoins, shelling out a staggering $555.8 million! That’s like paying $84,785 for each little glittering digital coin, as if they were rare golden tickets. 🍬

“$MSTR has scooped up 6,556 BTC for about $555.8 million, paying roughly $84,785 a pop, and boasting a 12.1% Bitcoin yield this year. As of April 20, @Strategy clutches 538,200 Bitcoins—bought for a jaw-dropping $36.47 billion at $67,766 each.”

— The ever-enthusiastic Michael Saylor (@saylor), April 21, 2025

Yes, you heard that right! MicroStrategy now owns a treasure trove of 538,200 Bitcoins, dropping about $36.47 billion on this peculiar stash, averaging $67,766 a coin. And the best part? Their digital gold mine is churning out a sprightly 12.1% Bitcoin yield in 2025! Not bad for a bunch of ones and zeros, eh? 💰

After pausing just long enough to catch their breath, these Bitcoin munchkins dove right back into the fray on April 14th, gobbling up 3,459 coins for $285.8 million. Each coin cost a pretty penny at $82,618—like gourmet chocolates, but with more volatility and fewer calories.

Through Bitcoin’s wild mood swings, MicroStrategy’s love affair with these cryptic coins stays fierce and unshaken. Their faithful buying binge is like a determined squirrel hoarding nuts for winter—only with far fancier currency. 🐿️💸

MicroStrategy Stocks Leap Like A Very Excited Frog

And if you thought the crypto craze ended there, think again! The company’s stock, known by its fancy ticker “MSTR,” has skyrocketed over 133% in just one year. It laughably outpaced the likes of Tesla, Bitcoin itself, Nvidia, and even Apple! This week, MSTR hopped up 13%, including a cheeky 3% leap in a single day, pushing shares to a heady $317. Imagine that—a stock doing better than the best rollercoaster in town!

Michael Saylor shared that more than 13,000 institutions and 814,000 retail investors own a piece of this Bitcoin bonanza directly. And wait, there’s more: about 55 million poor souls get to taste the magic of MicroStrategy through ETFs, mutual funds, pensions, and insurance portfolios. Talk about popular!

The Crypto Garden Blooms Green Again 🌱

As if sprinkled with fairy dust, MSTR’s rally swooped in alongside a bullish crypto market comeback. The total crypto wonderland’s value bounced back up to $2.75 trillion, with Bitcoin gleaming at nearly $87,500—the highest in three weeks! Ethereum chimed in with a pleasant 3.4% rise, trading close to $1,633, while the merry band of altcoins—XRP, Solana, Cardano, and even Dogecoin—joined the party with modest gains.

And just when you think this tale couldn’t get juicier, a glimmer of political hope shines through: China’s president hinted at reopening trade talks with President Trump, so long as mutual respect is on the menu. Shiny news like this always tickles investor spirits, sending global markets into a joyful jiggle. 🥳

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2025-04-21 15:09