They Bought More Bitcoin, and Now They’re Basically the Bitcoin Boss

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Well, folks, hold onto your wallets! Strategy just gobbled up another 13,390 bitcoins like they were candy at a Halloween sale, shelling out a cool $1.34 billion. That’s right, billion with a “B”, and they paid a hefty $99,856 per coin. I mean, who needs a yacht when you can have a digital fortune, right? Executive Chairman Michael Saylor must be sitting on a goldmine. Or should I say… bitcoin-mine?

Strategy’s Bitcoin Stash: Now a Whopping 568,840 BTC!

Yep, you read that right. Strategy, the bitcoin-obsessed firm that just can’t get enough, now holds a total of 568,840 bitcoins. They’ve been on this acquisition spree for a while, spending around $39.41 billion at an average price of $69,287 per BTC as of May 11, 2025. And if you think that’s wild, Saylor’s throwing out a 15.5% return on their bitcoin investments this year. Talk about making money while you sleep! 😴💸

And, of course, this is all part of Strategy’s big master plan. You know, to become the reigning king of all things bitcoin. The latest purchase comes just as bitcoin’s hanging out near $104,000, staying strong even as the world around us is… well, let’s just say “complicated” (geopolitical instability, anyone?). And hey, everyone loves a little drama, especially when it’s about stacking digital gold.

Strategy’s playbook? Easy: leverage equity, borrow a bit of cash, and snag as many bitcoins as humanly possible. At this point, they’re the corporate Big Kahuna of Bitcoin, attracting the eyes of Wall Street and crypto fanatics alike. Move over, Tesla. There’s a new bitcoin whale in town!

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2025-05-12 16:08