Tether’s Bitcoin Obsession: A Billion-Dollar Bet! 💸

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Tether, that paragon of fiscal responsibility, has once again demonstrated its… unique approach to financial stewardship. On September 30, the last day of Q3 2025, they acquired 8,888 BTC, a sum so vast it could buy a small island, a yacht, and still leave room for a lavish dinner party. 🏝️⚓

This acquisition marks Tether’s second grand gesture in 2025, following a similar spectacle in March. One might say they are on a roll, though the term ‘roll’ is perhaps too modest for their ambitions. Their Bitcoin stash now totals 86,335 BTC, a figure that would make even the most ardent penny-pincher weep with joy. 💸

Tether Makes Bitcoin (BTC) Purchase

Adding 8,888 BTC to their reserves was a move so bold, it could only be described as a ‘bold’ move. The transaction, first spotted by Onchain Lens, saw Bitcoin flow from Bitfinex hot wallets to Tether’s reserve address. One wonders if the Bitcoin was merely relocating or fleeing a scandal. 🧙‍♂️

Sixth-Largest BTC Wallet

Tether’s Bitcoin strategy, unveiled in May 2023, was as charming as it was perplexing. By allocating 15% of profits to Bitcoin, they’ve transformed into the sixth-largest Bitcoin wallet. At $9.75 billion, their holdings are a testament to their belief that stability is just a fancy word for stagnation. 🧠

With a $115 billion market cap, Tether wields liquidity like a scepter. Their balance sheet boasts $127 billion in US Treasuries and $5.47 billion in excess reserves-proof that they’re not just a stablecoin, but a financial colossus. 🏛️

Tether Could Become History’s Most Profitable Company

According to Matt Hougan, Tether could surpass even Saudi Aramco’s $120 billion annual profit. One can only imagine the champagne flowing when they achieve this feat. After all, what’s life without a little financial grandeur? 🥂

“At current interest rates, if Tether got to $3 trillion in assets – about 3% of the global money supply – it would top that, becoming the most profitable company in history.”

Hougan also suggests Tether’s IPO plans could place it among the world’s most valuable companies. A fitting end to a story where the only thing more impressive than their profits is their ability to convince the world that stability is a myth. 🌀

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2025-10-01 18:42