Spanish Bank Urges Rich Folks to Sprinkle Crypto on Their Cash Cakes — Here’s What Happened!

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Once upon a time, in the not-so-mysterious land of Spain, BBVA — that’s Banco Bilbao Vizcaya Argentaria, but let’s not get tongue-twisted about it — decided to tickle the wallets of its wealthiest clients with a peculiar suggestion. Instead of hiding all their money under gigantic mattresses or stuffing it in cheese wheels (a missed opportunity, frankly), BBVA whispered, “Why not toss a handful of your treasure — say, 3% to 7% — into the great unpredictable wilds of crypto?” Totally normal bank suggestion, right?

Philippe Meyer, the grand wizard (well, Head of Digital and Blockchain Solutions) at BBVA Switzerland, dazzled conference-goers in London with this revelation. “Since September last year, we’ve been telling our affluent chums to dabble in Bitcoin!” he declared. Apparently, if you’re feeling especially spicy, crank your crypto allocation higher! (It’s just a little risk, darling — what could possibly go wrong? 🐉💸)

Meyer insisted that clients gobbled up the advice faster than hot churros on a winter morning. “Look,” he said, possibly while twirling a golden coin, “even just a cheeky 3% in Bitcoin gives your portfolio a boost. At 3%, you’ll hardly lose any sleep — unless you dream of volatile price charts, of course.”

And yet, as BBVA tiptoed into crypto, stern-faced EU regulators all but wagged their fingers, grumbling about risk. In fact, according to the European Securities and Markets Authority (a name so long they must love paperwork), roughly 95% of European banks are giving crypto the cold shoulder.

BBVA Wins Spain’s Crypto Lottery Ticket

BBVA has been tossing crypto coins since 2021, but it wasn’t till late 2024 that they started giving “official advice” — putting them several lengths ahead of the slowpoke banking herd.

Then came March, and Spain’s regulators shrugged and let BBVA offer trading in both Bitcoin and Ethereum. No word on if they were bribed with tapas, but we can imagine.

BBVA’s cunning crypto moves rolled out quietly, like chocolate coins at Christmas, to their fanciest clients first. Soon users will be able to tap their phones and buy, sell, and manage digital coins faster than you can say “blockchain.”

MiCA Makes Crypto Rules — No Whizzpopping Allowed

BBVA scurried to expand its crypto empire just as MiCA (the European Markets in Crypto-Assets wizard’s handbook) finally got enforced at the end of 2024. All those EU crypto companies have until July 2026 to tidy their room and mind all the new rules. No more messy magic!

Santander Enters the Stablecoin Circus 🎪

Meanwhile, BBVA’s neighbor Santander peeked into the tent, dreaming up its very own stablecoins (currencies that don’t bounce like a kangaroo on a trampoline). Rumor has it they want both dollar and euro versions, ensuring maximum confusion for anyone over the age of 40. If you thought your gran was baffled by internet banking, just wait until she tries to buy a loaf of bread with an algorithm.

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2025-06-18 07:19