Robert Kiyosaki is back, and if you weren’t already clutching your wallet and/or mattress, his latest social media wisdom will almost certainly jumpstart your inner doomsday prepper. 🚨 He’s an evangelist for bitcoin, a skeptic of central bankers, and apparently owns more mines than a Bond villain.
Bitcoin: Harder Than Gold, Shinier Than Your Dad’s Retirement Dreams
Listen, if you’ve ever read Rich Dad Poor Dad—and judging by the way your uncle corners you at Thanksgiving, you probably have—you’ll know Kiyosaki is kind of the Nostradamus of personal finance, except the world’s not ending in fire, it’s ending in fake fiat. You could read his book in 50 different languages, which might help distract you while the markets implode.
Why is bitcoin better than gold or silver? One reason: 21 million. That’s it. Mic drop. 🎤
Kiyosaki’s logic is bulletproof—or at least, very shiny. “I own gold and silver mines and oil wells,” he says, as if that’s the sort of Tuesday hobby most of us enjoy. If gold goes up? He’ll just dig up more gold. If bitcoin goes up? Well, that’s tough luck, because unless you have a time machine or Satoshi’s private keys, 21 million is the hard ceiling. Scarcity: it’s not just for Beanie Babies anymore.
In a plot twist no one saw coming (except everyone who follows him), Kiyosaki predicts a market crash so large, it’ll make the 1929 crash look like a toddler tripping over a Lego. This throwback to his 2002 classic, Rich Dad’s Prophecy, should have come with a bottle of antacids and a fainting couch:
We’re about to get the “biggest crash in history,” in stocks, bonds, and real estate. To be fair, “the end is nigh” does seem more legitimate from a guy whose *actual* job is digging stuff out of the ground.
Silver, Kiyosaki says, is apparently about to double. (Just in time to fund your escape plan to Antarctica.) The only thing going up faster, he claims, might be the fake money printing machine at the Fed, which he describes as being less trustworthy than a used car salesman wearing sunglasses indoors. As he puts it, “savers are losers”—which is somewhat comforting, as most of us have very little to lose anyway.
The bottom line, delivered with the charm of a doomsday televangelist: Kiyosaki still doesn’t trust the Fed, the Treasury, or anyone who says “don’t worry.” He trusts gold, silver, and—most of all—bitcoin, which, unlike your faith in the dollar, has a cap. So when in doubt, embrace scarcity. Or at least, give your next cryptocurrency purchase a dramatic backstory—Kiyosaki would approve. 💸🪙
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2025-05-08 04:04