In the same hilarious interval, those prominent altcoin pretenders like Ethereum (ETH) and Solana (SOL) merely smirked with paltry gains of 12.90% and 13.24%, respectively, as if envious of Bitcoin’s vigorous jig. 🎃
New research (aka fancy math people) says your post-halving gains are shrinking faster than my patience for conference calls. 📉 Apparently, since your second halving, you’ve been delivering gains like a tired Uber driver-late and underwhelming. 🚗💨
And yet, here we are. The Tokyo-listed company has earned the title of the fourth-largest corporate Bitcoin holder globally, but that doesn’t seem to have inspired much investor confidence. The stock continues its steady downward slide. Investors, it appears, are playing a game of “will they, won’t they” with the shares, and the shares are losing.
Chancellor Rachel Reeves, alongside the illustrious Anthony Gutman of Goldman Sachs, shall grace a private roundtable this Monday. Their noble quest? To woo executives from tech and growth sectors, promising London as the ideal stage for their IPO debuts. A pitch so bold, it doth rival the greatest farces of our time! 🎭
Alongside the inevitable FUD (fear, uncertainty, and doubt, darling), the ASTER airdrop has left its community in a state of operatic despair. 🎭😱
The crown on Tron’s head doesn’t come from flashy marketing, but rather from stablecoin settlements. In fact, a whopping 51% of all circulating Tether USDT was minted on the Tron network. So, while other blockchain networks were throwing big parties, Tron was quietly counting its stablecoins and stacking its profits.
In the last 24 hours, ETH had a rollercoaster of a ride, dipping to $4,444 and then zooming up to a peak of $4,616. But, and here’s the kicker, it’s still about 8% shy of its all-time high of $4,953. Oh, and that record was set just back in late August. It’s like ETH just keeps teasing us with its potential. Will it finally break through the roof? Stay tuned… 🚀
Not really. Players are still shorting it like it’s Monday and they’re out of coffee.
And why, you ask? Well, it seems the grown-ups in suits (institutional adopters, they call themselves) have decided Bitcoin is the new darling of their portfolios. Macroeconomic factors, they mumble, favouring risk assets. Oh, how very fancy! 🥂 Meanwhile, the Crypto Fear and Greed Index is practically doing cartwheels into “greed” territory, as retail investors pile in like children at a candy shop. 🍭
Perpetual decentralized exchanges (Perp DEXs) achieved a historic milestone in September, with monthly trading volumes surpassing $1 trillion for the first time. According to Defillama, total volume reached $1.43 trillion, marking a nearly 50% increase from the previous month. A most impressive feat, though one wonders if the numbers are as accurate as a gentleman’s promise. 🤡
