Enter Arthur Hayes, the enfant terrible of BitMEX, who, with a flourish of his quill, penned his latest masterpiece, “Frowny Cloud.” 🌩️ In it, he bemoans the shrinking embrace of the US dollar’s liquidity-a tragedy, no doubt, for Bitcoin’s delicate sensibilities. “The dollar,” he declares with a dramatic sigh, “was the prima donna of 2025, and its retreat left Bitcoin in the shadows.” 🕶️
That’s why the street talk-also known as the trading floor, or whatever a market foghorn calls itself this week-is calling it a classic “buy the rumour, sell the news” caper. In the crypto realm, prices often rise ahead of big updates or listings, and then traders sell as soon as the event happens to lock profits or reduce risk. Now the question is whether IP is merely cooling off after an overheated sprint or if this selling is sturdy enough to start a deeper descent into the mines of volatility. 🧭💥
It closed at $97.9K, bringing its 2026 rally to 10%, but eased slightly to $96.5K at the time of writing.
At the heart of the muddle and merriment sits Ripple USD (RLUSD). LMAX will tuck RLUSD into its core collateral pocket across its globe-trotting trading stage. That means banks, brokers, and hefty funds using LMAX can hop from crypto to old-fashioned markets with a neat, smooth hop-no more frantic switches in the middle of a tea party. 🫖🪙
Key Highlights
Positive signals, you ask? Well, they include a rather boisterous whale trading activity and a rekindled interest in our dear Litecoin. It’s like watching a soap opera where the characters just refuse to exit stage left!
CryptoQuant, that oracle of blockchain wisdom, proclaims: “The primordial Bitcoin clans-those who hoarded coins when Satoshi still whispered in the shadows-have grown eerily quiet! 🕯️” Indeed, these OGs, whose coins slumbered for half a decade (or longer!), now clutch their treasure tighter than a miser at a gold rush.
Lo and behold, the Ethereum layer-2 has not only become the swiftest to reach stage one decentralization but has done so whilst processing over 4.4 billion transactions. Daily active users grew nearly eightfold compared to the previous year, and the total value locked has surpassed eleven billion dollars. Truly, a transformation from mere experiments to mainstream acceptance!
The U.S. Senate Banking Committee has postponed its vote on the crypto market structure bill. Because nothing says “regulation” like a bunch of politicians trying to figure out what a blockchain is. 🤷♂️
The President, a man whose every utterance seems torn from the pages of a political thriller penned by a drunken scribe, assured Reuters he has “no plan” to sack Powell. Yet his words drip with the venom of a thousand unspoken plots. “We are in a holding pattern,” he mused, as if piloting a plane with no wings. 🛫🌀
