The plan, set for discussion at an upcoming Financial Services Council meeting, would also allow banking groups to register as licensed crypto-exchange operators, giving retail and corporate clients direct access to digital assets through their existing banks. Because nothing says “trust” like letting your bank handle your crypto. 🤯
The Shiba Inu token, that once barked at the stars, now whimpers at $0.000010, a mere 10% rise from its weekend sorrow. Yet, it pales in comparison to the likes of Zcash and Synthetix, whose gains are as grand as a Ukrainian feast. 🥳🍖
Bitcoin (BTC) reached the lofty heights of $111,000 for the first time since October 16. It now sits 7.25% above its yearly low. And yet, it still finds itself in the comforting arms of a correction, down about 12% from its all-time high. Who knew virtual gold could be so volatile?
BlackRock’s iShares Bitcoin ETF is sashaying onto the London Stock Exchange (LSE), with shares as physically backed by BTC as a diet of kale and tofu – held securely via Coinbase, because who needs adventures when you’ve got custody? 😏
As the world collectively loses its mind over AI/HPC, Bitcoin miners are scrambling to rebrand like it’s 2000 and everyone’s a dot-com guru. CleanSpark (CLSK) threw its hat into the ring Monday, declaring war on its former self-Bitcoin mining-with a new identity crisis: “We’re now serious about data centers!”
Evernorth will spend its net proceeds on one thing and one thing only: acquiring XRP on the open market. This treasure hunt will create the largest institutional treasury ever dedicated to XRP. The remaining funds? Well, they’ll be used for “corporate purposes” and transaction costs, but let’s face it, we all know that the real treasure is the XRP. 💰
Bradley Duke, Managing Director and Head of Europe at Bitwise, spotlights this milestone in a recent tweet: “Big week this week for UK retail investors. From tomorrow morning, UK retail investors will be able to trade, once again, Crypto ETPs. In preparation for this, Bitwise has 4 ETPs ready.” The “direction of travel is clear for crypto,” Duke added. Oh, “once again”? Did they have a previous time where they could trade? Or is this just another “big week” that ends in tears? 🤡
Behold, the Pudgy Penguins are no longer content with the frigid climes of Web3. Igloo Inc., in a stroke of audacious whimsy, has partnered with Invariant to escort PENGU to the hallowed halls of Washington D.C. Yes, dear reader, our tuxedoed friends are now rubbing flippers with policymakers, a spectacle as surreal as it is strategic. This foray into the realm of the bureaucrat is said to lend PENGU an air of legitimacy, though one wonders if the penguins themselves are merely biding their time before demanding a senate seat. 🕴️🗳️