Currency Forecast

Keiser, with his customary flair, has directed our collective gaze to a scene seldom frequented by the doe-eyed retail trader: the oh-so-fascinating derivatives architecture of the ever-glamorous BlackRock’s IBIT ETF. His premise? The next leg of Bitcoin’s opulent marathon will not be propelled by the usual fanfare or sleight of halving, oh no – it’s going to be whisked away by a shrewd derivatives restructuring. We couldn’t agree more, dear readers. 💡

The South African Reserve Bank, in a move that smells suspiciously like locking the barn door after the horses have bolted, has decided that crypto assets and stablecoins are now officially… a thing they need to worry about. Seems a lot of folk are actually using this digital nonsense, and the SARB doesn’t like surprises. Now they’re scrambling to figure out how to control a beast that doesn’t recognize borders – or common sense, for that matter. They’re racing to update the dusty old rulebook and keep a closer eye on where all the money is going. Honestly, it’s a bit like trying to herd cats with a spreadsheet. 😹

And lo! Enter OxChain, that prophet of modern times, who, upon his social media chariot (formerly known as Twitter), spreads the gospel of on-chain data. He boldly declares that this recent downturn is not the harbinger of a cycle’s end. No, the fall from grace-Bitcoin’s descent from the high heavens of $120,000 to a tragic $90,000-was… mundane. It lacked the usual frenzy, the hyped-up speculation, the frenzied screams of the crowd rushing to buy up their fortunes. OxChain finds no euphoria here, only the cold, indifferent forces of demand vanishing like a puff of smoke.

For those unacquainted with the ways of Google (or Alphabet, as it insists upon being called), by 2017 it had already established itself as the undisputed sovereign of search and digital advertising. Yet, its full dominion-over clouds, artificial intelligences, and other such modern marvels-was still but a distant dream. 🌥️

Trading at $35.24 at the moment, Hyperliquid has seen a 1.7% decline in a single day-a sad ode to its 27% retreat over the past month. It now languishes 41% below its September high of $59, reminiscent of a fading summer love, one filled with regrets.

To consider this current confusion noteworthy, one must appreciate the cunning at play. Several illustrious analysts and commentators, whose insights are as sharp as a rapier in the dimmest candlelight, have pointed to egregious outflows and anomalous movements of wallets, yet they overlooked the very cause: Coinbase’s internal reshuffling. This oversight has led many to believe that long-term holders are in a frenzy of panic-selling, thus emboldening fear in an already fragile market. Such a conclusion, my dear reader, would be as absurd as suspecting Miss Bennet of disingenuous romancing of Mr. Bingley.

ETH derivatives are currently exhibiting the emotional complexity of a depressed goldfish-bullish appetite? Nah. More like “mild confusion with a hint of fear.” Meanwhile, Ethereum’s TVL is slinking away like a cat that just realized it knocked over an expensive vase, and network fees have gone on a diet. Risk aversion isn’t just persistent-it’s now bringing snacks and settling in.

Breaking the $190 resistance level would be a good start. That, and maybe a little market optimism thrown in. But hey, AAVE’s revenue keeps it in the game, so there’s hope for a comeback if the vibes improve.

In the past 24 hours, it managed a 1% rise-how quaint! And over the week, a 3% gain. Trading volume? A mere $3.89 billion, darling. Still, it’s 40% below its July 2025 high of $3.65. One can only sigh and sip one’s martini. 🍸

On the hourly chart, SEI seems to be trying to recover after a long, drawn-out series of lower highs and lower lows. Recent price candles have managed to nudge their way from the $0.13 region up to a feeble $0.1409, where the price has sat uncomfortably for several sessions. Frankly, it’s more of a consolidation phase than any kind of bold, decisive trend shift. Don’t hold your breath. 😤