Now, this isn’t just any old transaction. Oh no, this Himalayan kingdom is stirring up more gossip than a reality TV show! Rumor has it they’re preparing to sell; I mean, who wouldn’t want to cash in on some digital llama coins? 🦙
After showering the creditors with a mere 93 percent of what they were owed last year (because why give it all at once?), Celsius now promises to bless them with the rest-just in time for August 20, 2025. The restructuring plan, which birthed the grand idea of the Bitcoin mining company Ionic Digital, aims to maximize recovery for these beleaguered souls. Who wouldn’t trust a mining company to save the day, right? 😏
Intersect added that “more than 30 vendors have now signed contracts,” with those agreements being published for public review. The live “Intersect Administered Contracts” ledger confirms a growing roster of counterparties and amounts-ranging from the ₳64.3 million “Catalyst 2025” program to infrastructure and tooling efforts such as a ZK bridge and maintenance of key developer libraries. Intersect says additional contracts will be posted in the days ahead “together with the funding of related smart contracts.” 💰
On the 7th of August, the esteemed Chainlink network declared its own reserve, a veritable treasure trove of its native token, LINK. Collected from both onchain service fees and offchain enterprise revenue, this initiative weaves a direct connection between the protocol’s business acumen and the long-term demand for its token. One cannot help but admire the elegance of such a plan, though one wonders if it will rival the audacity of Mr. Bingley’s ballroom expenditures.
To put this in perspective, grabbing 1% of Bitcoin’s circulating supply means wrestling control of about 210,000 BTC from the market. At today’s prices? That’s roughly $24 billion-enough money to buy several small islands or fund an endless supply of avocado toast for millennials. So far, only Strategy (formerly MicroStrategy) has managed to surpass this threshold, sitting pretty on their throne with 628,946 BTC tucked safely away. One wonders if they’ve considered framing each one digitally.
According to their hootenanny of an announcement on X (formerly the bird app, for you old-timers), BTCS is handin’ out $0.05 per share in ETH. That’s right, no cash, no checks-just good ol’ Ethereum. And if you’re loyal enough to stick around till January 26, 2026, they’ll toss in an extra $0.35 per share. 🤑 That’s $0.40 total, folks-enough to make a short-seller weep into his whiskey. 🥃
Krüger’s take? He’s confident the cycle isn’t over because he expects the new Fed chair to bring back dovish policies like it’s 2021 all over again. And no, markets aren’t ready for it yet. “Once Trump announces his nominee,” Krüger wrote, “that’s when things will start getting interesting.” Translation: strap in, folks. We’re about to see if Bitcoin can survive another round of political roulette. 🎲
According to the wise wizards at Justpit, who peer into their crystal charts with furrowed brows, $WLD is clinging to the $0.95 support like a limpet on a rock. This isn’t just any old number-it’s the lower boundary of an ascending trendline, as sturdy as a giant’s boot. 🥾 If it holds, huzzah! The memecoin might just muster the pluck to charge at $1.13. But if it slips? Oh dear, $0.87 awaits, grinning like a Cheshire cat with a secret. 😼
For those playing at home, Tether, the El Salvador-based stablecoin juggernaut, has its USDT token sitting pretty with a $167 billion market cap. That’s more money than I’ve ever seen in my wallet-or anyone else’s for that matter. 😎
In a move that can only be described as a U-turn of Olympic proportions, Michael Saylor has decided to flip-flop on his previous equity ATM (which, for the uninitiated, stands for “At The Market” and not “All The Moolah”). The latest guidance allows for the selling of MSTR stock to buy more Bitcoin [BTC], even if the premium decides to take a nosedive. 🎢
