Currency Forecast

Enter Fusaka, the upgrade with a name that sounds like a rejected sushi roll. While its release remains as tentative as a cat deciding whether to sit on your keyboard, testing is moving forward at what can only be described as “blockchain speed.” A new devnet is expected this week, featuring 11 proposed improvements. Among them is EIP-7825, which promises to strengthen security and scalability—because nothing screams “trustworthy” like code written by people who wear hoodies indoors. Meanwhile, features like EIP-7907 and the controversial EVM Object Format have been dropped, presumably to make room for more bugs. 🐜

On the vast digital battleground we call X, PlanB bursts forth with his logic, suggesting Bitcoin’s S2F ratio struts about proudly at 120, while the golden oldie shuffles behind with a mundane 60. Scarcity, it appears, has given Bitcoin a golden crown despite gold’s nobility. Quite the absurd twist, eh? 🧐

Imagine, if you will, a magical creature that grows by 2.07% in just 24 hours. That’s right, the rate of Ethereum (ETH) has done just that, leaving us all wondering what sorcery is at play here! 🧙‍♂️✨

Now, what is this so-called golden cross? It transpires when the 50-day moving average decides to play leapfrog over the 200-day moving average, and traders, those hawkish harbingers of fortune, regard it as a bullish hint—like a magician whispering sweet promises of plentiful tomatoes in a drought! 🍅

On our daily map of existence, bitcoin has managed to keep its forward momentum alive after wrestling its way back from the dark depths of $98,240. After a brief moment of euphoria at $123,236, we now enter a consolidation phase that’s as tight as a pair of trousers after Thanksgiving dinner—reduced volume included! Should it venture above the mystical $123,236 resistance with a cacophony of cheers (otherwise known as volume confirmation), we may very well witness the continuation of this hopeful uptrend, with targets that are not so much beyond $127,000 as they are darting towards some distant planet! Traders with a taste for caution are affectionately advised to place their stop-losses below $117,500. Beware the breakdown! Should bitcoin slip beneath $115,000, the bullish setup would be tossed into a deep, dark cosmic void.

The ‘DeFi ecosystem’ – which is basically a fancy way of saying people are locking up their money in complicated online boxes – is apparently booming. It’s now worth $10.26 billion, the most it’s been in almost half a year. And wouldn’t you know it, this is largely because the price of SOL went up. It’s a truly remarkable cycle of…well, I’m not entirely sure what it is, but it’s happening. Jito Sol, Jupiter Exchange, and Kamino Finance are leading the charge, apparently.

Shanghai’s governing body, in a display of bureaucratic pronouncements – a three-day conference, naturally – declared this development. Partnerships were forged with AnchorX (a name that evokes both security and…anchors) and Eastcompeace (sounds terribly peaceful, doesn’t it? Until you consider what they’re securing). They aim to launch this yuan-backed creation. One imagines little digital yuan running around, seeking refuge.

They recently snagged an additional 10.2489 BTC for the bargain price of £89,765.73 ($120,826.51) each. A real steal, right? It’s not like you could buy a mid-sized car for that price or anything. 🏎️ The total bill came to around £920,000 ($1,238,000)—a sum that only makes sense if you’re either very rich or extremely optimistic about the future of online cat videos.

This ambitious endeavor, birthed from the minds of Andrew Keys, previously a dignitary on the board of Consensys, and David Merin, who once gallivanted through corporate corridors at the same esteemed institution, now wears the mantle of Ether Machine’s chief strategist. Their announcement tumbled forth from the depths of economic enthusiasm on a rather ordinary Monday, transforming the mundane hustle of the week into a potential gold rush.

Here’s the secret sauce: raise some dough, either by selling shares or borrowing big. Then, take that sweet, sweet cash and plow it into crypto, beefing up your balance sheet and giving your stock price a steroid shot. With the market all hyped up and your stock soaring like an eagle 🦅, you raise even more moolah. Rinse. Repeat. It’s like a never-ending cycle of crypto riches.