Crypto Roller Coaster: MYX, WLD, PENGU Up, ETFs Are Like Meh!

Now, hold onto your hats: Bitcoin’s hanging in there at $112,226 with a 24-hour trading volume of $33.73 billion. It managed a modest 0.92% bump yesterday. You know, like when you try to make a salad and end up adding too much dressing. Ethereum’s doing its thing too, creeping up by 0.74%, bringing it to $4,334.15 with $26.30 billion in volume. So yeah, it’s like a family reunion where everyone’s just… showing up. 🙃

Grayscale’s Cryptic Ballet: A Leap for Chainlink ETF 🕺🔗

With a flourish, Grayscale has submitted its petition to the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) to transform its existing Chainlink Trust into a spot exchange-traded fund. The transformation, should it be blessed by the SEC, would allow the ETF to trade on NYSE Arca under the charming ticker GLNK, as per a Monday S-1 registration statement.

Bitcoin Futures on Binance Hit Record Highs, Surpassing Global Real Estate Valuation!

The recent drop from Bitcoin’s all-time highs has failed to dampen the spirits of the derivative markets on Binance – the world’s largest cryptocurrency exchange. This, dear reader, is a key indicator of Bitcoin’s growing influence in global finance, as its futures contracts on Binance have surged to levels never before seen. How quaint, a digital asset usurping traditional markets. 👀

SOMI Crypto: 316% Gains in a Week – Moon or Bust? 🚀💸

Somnia [SOMI] has shot up 316% from its September 4th low of $0.38. That’s like turning a lemonade stand into a Fortune 500 company in a week. This wild ride kicked off after SOMI got listed on Binance, Bybit, and Bitget – the crypto equivalent of hitting the big leagues. 🏆