“Ah, but fear not!” he proclaimed, “for all those shiny gadgets shall soon find themselves ensnared in the web of semiconductor tariffs, a special focus designed to ensure these treasures are brought back to the homeland.”
The maneuver was executed with USDC, transferred from their chief wallet into a trading vessel that’s been around these parts before, according to fresh reckonings by Arkham Intelligence. Ain’t that a twist in the tale?
Our dear CEO, Michael Saylor, has been playing coy on social media, teasing us with clues that MicroStrategy is not done hoarding Bitcoin like it’s the last slice of pizza at a party. He shared a little something on X (formerly Twitter, because why not?) showcasing the company’s Bitcoin portfolio. Spoiler alert: it’s looking pretty juicy.
Enter one Michaël van de Poppe, a fellow who fancies himself a prophet of the crypto realm. This whimsical fund manager has likened our current plight in the realm of Bitcoin to the grand calamity known as the COVID crash of 2020, a time when we all learned that toilet paper was indeed more precious than gold!
Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick casually mentioned on Sunday that the White House’s decision to exempt items like smartphones and computers from those hefty tariffs was just a temporary fling. Who knew tariffs could be so dramatic? 🎭
Picture, if you will, the absurd comedy of our existence: here we are, mere pawns in the game of economic chess between great powers! 🃏 The Americans, in their infinite wisdom (or perhaps madness?), pause their tariffs like a drunkard momentarily stopping his vodka consumption, only to resume with greater vigor later.
Ah, Jasmy Coin (JASMY), the darling of the East, often dubbed Japan’s Bitcoin, has made a comeback worthy of a Hollywood script. After languishing at a pitiful $0.0082 earlier this month, it has now soared to a high of $0.017, a staggering 103% increase! Who knew a coin could have such a flair for the dramatic? 🎭
After inspecting several of these devious texts, BeInCrypto is fairly certain we’ve got a specific group of hackers targeting Binance users with an organized, if not exactly innovative, phishing campaign.
In a recent discourse with the venerable CNBC Television, Mr. Lee expounded upon the notion that a cooling of tariff negotiations would, in all likelihood, diminish the specter of recession that has loomed over our economy like a particularly gloomy cloud. ☁️
Meanwhile, the smaller holders, bless their hearts, have barely managed to increase their holdings. Wallets containing between 1 trillion and 10 trillion SHIB have recently plummeted by more than 2%. Early investors, who once believed they were on a one-way rocket to the moon, are now staring at their screens in disbelief, wondering if they accidentally boarded a flight to the nearest black hole instead. 🚀💔