In his “please-don’t-sue-me” thread, CZ explained how a one-second frame of some tutorial video flashed “TST,” Internet rabid-sharks smelled blood, and the market cap ballooned to $495k faster than I can inhale a cheesecake. Then the video was yeeted off the web, and-allegedly-the “creator” key was ceremoniously Ctrl-Alt-Deleted. Right. Because no one *ever* secretly screenshots private keys. 😇
This report comes straight from Theminermag, the holy scripture of the crypto mining church, shining light on the latest gossip and research in the land of institutional Bitcoin mining – or, as some call it, the modern gold rush that never quite got off the ground without a few explosions.
Analysts, those modern-day soothsayers armed with charts instead of crystal balls, are peering into their screens like fortune-tellers at a carnival. They’re waiting for LINK to either break through the macro resistance at $26.50 or face the humiliation of being rejected yet again, only to slink back down toward $20.25. A successful breach could herald a bullish extravaganza; failure might just send it crawling back to lick its wounds. What drama! 🎭
Now, this isn’t just a happy little puppy scurrying around. No, sir! This project kicked off its pre-launch festivities on April 1-no joke!-and has been steadily sniffing around the $850,000 milestone by July 25. But wait, there’s more! Husky Inu is eyeing an even bigger ball of cash-$872,976 so far, to be exact-ready to howl at the moon when it hits that $900,000 mark. 🎯
With a market cap of $409.6 million and daily trading volume flirting with $342 million, ZORA is swimming in liquidity deeper than the ocean. But is a pullback lurking around the corner, ready to pounce like a hungry catfish? Let’s dive into the numbers and see if we can separate the gold from the fool’s gold. 😉
With these freshly minted bytes of “digital gold,” Sequans’ hoard now stands at a majestic 3,171 BTC-enough, if stacked end-to-end, to reach the moon and back (assuming the moon has excellent Wi-Fi). All told, the firm has poured roughly $370 million into this cyber-treasury, for an average cost of about $116,709 per bitcoin. The spreadsheet practically glows with smug certainty: their average buy-in is so close to current market levels that it could borrow sugar and still pay it back before the next halving. 😏
What’s fueling this madness, you wonder? Oh, just a trifecta of tomfoolery:
Gone are the days when only crypto whales had to worry about being dragged into a van. Now, even your cousin who bought $6,000 worth of Dogecoin on a whim is fair game. And yes, people are dying over sums that wouldn’t even cover a decent used car. Vranova claims these crimes are happening weekly, which makes me wonder if we should start calling it “Crypto Crime Day” instead of Taco Tuesday. 🌮⚰️
The avowed raison d’être for this latest adrenaline jab? Apparently, Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin were rumoured to be sharing a cordial Diet Coke next week, giving world peace-and, naturally, digital tulips-the merest prospect of a handshake. Nothing cements a bull run like geopolitical gossip. Meanwhile, the US CPI numbers toddle in tomorrow to remind everyone that even in utopia, rent is still due.
In a world where the value of a coin can be as fickle as the weather, S&P has taken it upon themselves to assess the stability of these digital wonders. This endeavor, which began in 2023, aims to evaluate the ability of stablecoin issuers to maintain a steady value relative to the good old-fashioned fiat currencies. The review delves deep into the creditworthiness of Sky’s liabilities, the USDS and DAI stablecoins, and the sUSDS and sDAI savings tokens. 🤔💰