Intesa’s Bitcoin Gambit: ETFs, Options, and Sartorial Elegance

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Oh, do cast your eyes upon the latest stratagem from Intesa Sanpaolo, that most distinguished of banking houses, who have taken to the crypto market like a duchess to a vintage shawl-both with a hint of skepticism and a dash of bravado. Their recent disclosures? A veritable treasure trove of financial theatrics, replete with $96 million in bitcoin ETFs, a penchant for put options, and a Shared-Defined designation that sounds suspiciously like a gentlemen’s club for investment decisions.

In the hallowed quarter of December 2025, the bank’s 13F filing revealed a portfolio as opulent as a Balmoral ballroom. Therein, one finds $72.6 million in the ARK 21Shares Bitcoin ETF (a rather fetching ticker, if one admires alliteration), and $23.4 million in the iShares Bitcoin Trust, totaling just shy of a hundred million dollars. A minor blip for a bank of Intesa’s stature, yet it speaks volumes of their daring-or perhaps their accountant’s fondness for spreadsheets.

But wait! There’s more! A mere $4.3 million in the Bitwise Solana Staking ETF, which, if I may paraphrase Oscar Wilde, is to cryptocurrency what a monocle is to vision-superfluous, yet oddly alluring. And let us not forget the grandest gambit of all: a put option on Strategy, that paragon of BTC hoarding, whose balance sheet boasts 714,644 BTC. Imagine the thrill of being able to sell MSTR shares at a predetermined price, like a suitor with a firm hand on the reins of romance, yet no obligation to propose.

This, dear reader, is a dance between numbers and nerve. The put option, coupled with their bullish ETF stance, suggests a bet that Strategy’s stock will tumble back into alignment with its BTC holdings-a game of whack-a-mole with market multiples. At last report, Strategy traded at a 1.21 multiple of its net asset value, a figure that would make a high society hostess blush. Should this gap narrow, Intesa’s ledger shall smile wider than a Cheshire cat at a tea party.

The filing also boasts equity stakes in crypto-linked firms, including Coinbase, Robinhood, and the ever-ambitious ETHZilla. Alas, these are but pinpricks in the grand tapestry of finance, with the largest-$4.4 million in Circle-amounting to a polite nod rather than a standing ovation.

Now, the “DFND” designation? A curious choice, akin to a footman muttering, “It’s all very well, but who’s really calling the shots?” One suspects Intesa’s own trading desk, or perhaps a coterie of institutional clients, are the true puppeteers behind this financial pantomime. The truth, like a well-tied cravat, remains artfully obscured.

Meanwhile, the bank’s U.S. wealth management arm has filed a 13F devoid of digital assets, a decision as daring as a vicar wearing a top hat to a garden party. But then again, some prefer the safety of tradition over the thrill of innovation-though one wonders if they’ve merely misplaced their sense of adventure.

Let us not overlook Intesa’s earlier foray into the crypto realm, when they purchased 11 bitcoins for a princely sum of $1 million. A modest beginning, perhaps, but it hints at a future where even the stodgiest of banks might don a bowler hat and stride boldly into the digital age. All in all, a tale of calculated risks, sartorial confidence, and the eternal quest to outwit the market-preferably while sipping Darjeeling and contemplating the finer points of a well-pressed waistcoat.

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2026-02-17 15:58