Hold onto your wallets, folks! Gemini, the crypto exchange that promised to be the next big thing, just took a nosedive of nearly 24% since its IPO last week. It’s like the market said, “Thanks for the laughs, now give me my money back!” 💸
Trading on Nasdaq, Gemini’s shares closed Tuesday down about 6% at $30.42. The IPO kicked off at $28 and, for about 5 minutes, investors were popping champagne as the stock soared to $45.89 – ah, the sweet smell of easy money! But don’t get too comfy; that high was about as stable as a Jenga tower in a wind tunnel. Now it’s down over 34% from its peak, which means if you bought at the top, congratulations, you’re officially a gambling addict. 🎰
Why the trip to investor purgatory? Apparently, Gemini isn’t exactly rolling in Benjamins. They posted a net loss of $283 million for the first half of 2025, which is like buying a yacht and then realizing the engine runs on monopoly money. For context, they lost $159 million *all* of 2024. Their pre-trading valuation was $3.3 billion-some big brains clearly had a moment of optimism there! 🤦♂️
Ed Engel from Compass Point put it gently: Gemini is trading at 26 times its *annualized first-half revenue*. Translation: It’s like paying for a car you can’t drive. Classic “we’ll sell it next year” thinking. Meanwhile, Coinbase is holding steady, Robinhood is slipping slightly, and Circle is showing the market some moves, up 13%. It’s like crypto’s own reality show, “Who’s Still Standing?”
To be fair, Gemini did raise a cool $425 million from the IPO, enough to throw a really fancy party-maybe several. But Wall Street’s love affair with crypto is looking more like a bad Tinder date: great first impression, but now everyone’s wondering if this is going anywhere. Investors want profits, people, not just shiny promises and sleek websites!
So, Gemini’s grand adventure might just be a spicy cautionary tale for the next crypto darling dreaming of IPO glory. Lesson learned? In the public markets, you either pay your bills or become the punchline. And right now, Gemini’s the joke that nobody’s laughing at. 🎭💔
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2025-09-16 20:57