Spot Bitcoin ETFs just had a week where they cried, “I’m back!” with $996 million in inflows-the kind of money that makes your ex’s bank statements look modest. Farside Investors says it’s the biggest since January, which is either a comeback or a midlife crisis.
Total net inflows hit $996 million last week, which is impressive unless you’re comparing it to January’s $1.4 billion. But hey, second best is still better than being in a support group for forgotten crypto projects.
The real drama was Friday, when $663.9 million flowed in like it was Black Friday at a Bitcoin ATM. Meanwhile, the rest of the week was a rollercoaster of emotions: $411.5 million on Tuesday, $186 million on Wednesday, and then a sad $26 million on Thursday. Monday started with a $291 million outflow-turns out, Bitcoin ETFs are just like your dating app profile: all over the place.
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The week ended with ETFs holding $101 billion in assets, which is enough to buy every meme coin and then some. Daily trading volumes hit $4.8 billion, because nothing says “I’ve got nothing left to lose” like throwing money at digital ponies.
Despite the market being more unstable than a house of cards in a hurricane, capital keeps flowing back into Bitcoin via ETFs. Because nothing says “regulated investment” like a product that exists in a spreadsheet and a lawyer’s PowerPoint.
Goldman Sachs BTC ETF: New story
Goldman Sachs is now cooking up a Bitcoin ETF for people who think “volatility” is a type of yoga. Their new “Bitcoin Premium Income” ETF is basically financial Jell-O-squishy, wobbly, and pretending it’s not dessert.
Instead of holding actual Bitcoin, it uses derivatives to give you exposure while making you feel like you’re playing chess against the market. Eric Balchunas called it “boomer candy,” which is just a fancy way of saying, “Here’s a lollipop with a 20% fee.”
If this launches, it’ll be the crypto equivalent of a salad bar at a steakhouse-everyone’s confused, but someone will order it anyway.
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2026-04-18 13:16