Crypto Siren Lures Aussies to Financial Doom 💸

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Ah, the land down under, where the kangaroos roam free and the financial advisers, it seems, are as dodgy as a plate of spoiled vegemite sandwiches. 🤢

The Australian Securities and Investment Commission (ASIC) has given a certain Glenda Maree Rogan the old heave-ho, banning her from offering financial services for a whopping 10 years. The reason, you ask? Well, it appears she had a bit of a penchant for “investing” her clients’ dosh into a crypto platform that was about as legitimate as a Nigerian prince’s email asking for your bank details. 🤑

ASIC claims that between March 2022 and June 2023, Rogan took her clients’ funds on a merry dance, transferring them to personal and company bank accounts, converting them to crypto, and then sending them off to the Financial Centre, a platform that ASIC has listed as an unlicensed entity that “should not be trusted.” One wonders how she managed to keep a straight face while telling her clients they were investing in a high-yield fixed-interest account. 🤣

But wait, there’s more! ASIC also alleges that Rogan “misled clients about the nature, risks and liquidity of the investment to induce them to invest.” Ah, the old “it’s as safe as houses” routine, eh? 🏠

Now, Rogan’s clients are left to pick up the pieces, while she’s left to ponder the error of her ways. ASIC’s 10-year ban took effect on June 6, and an investigation into Rogan’s activities is still ongoing. One can only hope that she’s not planning on starting a new career as a used car salesperson. 🚗

Australia’s national financial intelligence agency has also been cracking down on crypto, rolling out new operating rules and transaction limits for crypto ATM operators to help combat scams. It’s a bit like trying to hold water in one’s hands, but one supposes it’s a start. 💧

In April, the Australian Transaction Reports and Analysis Centre (AUSTRAC) told inactive registered crypto exchanges to withdraw their registrations or risk having them canceled over fears that the dormant firms could be used for scams. And in February, AUSTRAC took action against 13 remittance service providers and crypto exchanges, with over 50 others still being investigated regarding possible compliance issues. It’s a bit of a crypto crackdown, if you will. 🔒

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2025-06-13 05:43