Cryptonews

Vaulta has recently paired with VirgoCX, giving birth to VirgoPay, a miraculous contraption that promises to transform cross-border remittances. With a sprinkle of stablecoins and a dash of speed, it aspires to slice fees as if they were buttered bread on a Sunday morning! 🥳 Here we have Vaulta in the role of a dutiful servant, settling transactions from a high horse, reaching out to distant lands—namely the U.S., Canada, Brazil, and Hong Kong—where wallets are chubby and aspirations boundless.

Verily, to keep Bitcoin from tumbling below $70,000 is of utmost importance for our noble bulls. Should this cryptocurrency dare to dip to $65,000, your ordinary Bitcoin holder may become quite “sensitive” indeed, as Monsieur Check warns! 😱

Yet, lest we be ensnared by its bearish classification, I shall impart a delightful jest: the Shark often bears gifts of bullish expansion; a crafty mischief before it reveals its final act! Indeed, it seems that in the case of our beloved Bitcoin, this very scenario unfolds like a melodrama on a moonlit stage. 🌙

Right now, Dogecoin is chilling at $0.16, but it took a little tumble to $0.13 on April 9. Ouch! According to CoinMarketCap, it’s like watching a puppy learn to walk. 🐾

In a post on X (formerly Twitter – let’s not ask why), the “guru” warned his 2.7 million followers to “please listen to gold, silver, and Bitcoin.” Yes, we’re all apparently just too busy sipping lattes and ignoring the cries of our financial doom. Thanks, Kiyosaki, for the wake-up call. ☕💰

To no one’s surprise, CZ, the co-founder and former CEO of Binance, the titan of cryptocurrency exchanges, swiftly took to “X” (previously known as Twitter, if you can still remember) to address these preposterous claims.

Brian Christian Alexander – a name that just screams “trustworthy crypto guru” – announced that developers can now link their ERC-20 wallets. Because who doesn’t have an ERC-20 wallet these days? It’s as essential as a good muffin recipe. They’re talking about “seamless payments 🔥”. Seamless, like my attempts to avoid eye contact with the cashier when my coupon doesn’t work.

What makes Metaplanet’s recent antics stand out, you ask? Well, let’s just say Japan’s 30-year treasury yields are soaring, and typically, in such uncertain times, companies would sprint away from the dollar. But nope—Metaplanet is out here making Bitcoin moves like it’s business as usual. A bold strategy, indeed!

In a delightful twist of fate, Babylon allows its users to bask in the glory of staking rewards, all while clinging to the comforting bosom of Bitcoin’s inherent security. No need for those pesky wrapped assets or the treacherous cross-chain bridges that often lead one astray! Instead, this protocol offers a veritable sanctuary for staking, a native alternative that whispers sweet nothings of safety and decentralization. 🌐

With the announcement of commission-free trading for over 11,000 US-listed stocks and ETFs, Kraken has made it clear that it is no longer content to merely dominate the digital currency space. No, it now seeks to conquer the world of traditional finance, one stock at a time. The rollout, beginning April 14th, will initially target select states, including New Jersey, Connecticut, and Alabama, because apparently, those are the places where people are most likely to trust a crypto exchange with their life savings.