Cryptonews

Following the festive exultation of Liberation Day, an air of dread wove itself through the market—a dramatic flair reminiscent of a tragicomedy. The resulting crash, a spectacle rivaling the most dramatic of stage plays, left many a market artiste slack-jawed in wonder. With nearly every nation, save our somnolent friend China, casting anxious glances towards the mighty US, the specter of bearish gloom still lingers. One must ask, with a sardonic chuckle, can the bullish darlings keep the soirée alive should Bitcoin pirouette above the enchanted thresholds of $80,000 or the divinely fated $81,100? 🎭

The voting extravaganza took place on the Kroll Issuer Services platform from March 19 to March 28, with over 141,000 creditors representing $195.65 million in claims. That’s a lot of zeros! 💸

Indeed, the modular oracle protocol, known to the world as RedStone (RED), now lends its considerable prowess to HyperLend, the very first lending platform to be constructed upon the Hyperliquid (HYPE) Ethereum Virtual Machine. This splendid integration permits HyperLend to operate its lending platform with a degree of security and accuracy that would make even the most fastidious of traders blush with satisfaction.

In a move that threatens to shock the faint of heart, our friends at Teucrium Investment Advisors have resolved to join the ETF fray with their 2x Long Daily XRP contrivance—known by the elegant nomenclature of XXRP. With the blessings of the New York Stock Exchange at their side, they intend to invite worthy (and perhaps overly bold) investors to double their daily enchantment with Ripple’s beloved token. Whether such an investment is wise or the height of folly shall be left to each person’s own reflection. 👀

On April 7, they decided to drop the guest list and agenda like it’s hot, and let’s just say, the crypto world is holding its breath. Will this be the moment we finally get some regulations, or just a bunch of suits arguing over who gets to wear the fanciest tie? 🤔

Unlike the usual closed-door meetings where decisions are made in the shadows, this roundtable is part of the SEC’s grand plan to gather real-world input before finalizing any rules. The public can tune in via livestream, and in-person attendees at SEC headquarters in Washington, D.C., can submit feedback through note cards or email during the event. Because nothing says “transparency” like scribbling your thoughts on a piece of paper and handing it to a stranger.

Bitcoin, that haughty luminary, lingered near the mundane $75,000 during the debacle, only to reemerge in splendid form above $79,000—imbuing the scene with a dash of iridescent confidence and a wink of exquisite charm.

Ah, Bitcoin! That noble prince of currencies, stands steadfast like Tartuffe’s conviction! While lesser coins tremble and quake, our beloved BTC maintains its dignity near 80,000 ducats. The peasants, in their wisdom (or perhaps folly 😏), have increased their trading by 73%. Such devotion!

In a press release that probably had everyone at Binance doing a little happy dance, they announced that KernelDAO is officially joining the party. Mark your calendars, folks, because starting April 9 at 00:00 UTC, you can join in on the fun. Just remember, no one likes a party crasher, so don’t believe any rumors about early sales. They’re as false as my last New Year’s resolution! 🙄