Cryptonews

In a recent missive (because why not sound important?), Solana Mobile declared the Saga’s end-of-support lifecycle. Customer support? Now limited to “general inquiries”-a polite way of saying, “Good luck, good sir, you’re on your own.”

Maple, for its part, will introduce a collection of institutional collateral, aka assets that are backed by “real-world” credit (yes, that’s a thing now) and are designed to churn out consistent yield, to Aave’s bustling lending markets. The first step on this wondrous journey? Listing syrupUSDT on Aave’s Plasma market, followed by the ever-appealing syrupUSDC on the core market. Because why wouldn’t you want some syrup with your stablecoins, right? 🥞

And behold! On October 21, the press cried out, “Tether’s investing in Nairobi!” -like a city mugged by a giant who now whispers promises of prosperity. The masterstroke? Embedding USDT into Africa’s chaotic, yet hopeful digital scene-think of it as slipping a coin into a slot machine, but instead of luck, you get a future. The brain behind this? CEO Paolo Ardoino, with words that sound noble but perhaps mask a thirst for dominance: “We aim to reduce friction…” Yeah, sure, as if money flows without friction in every crime novel.

In his latest X tirade-do pardon the anachronism-he urges one to hoard the stuff like a squirrel with an acorn obsession, even if it means dabbling in those frightfully leveraged call options or, heavens, borrowing the family jewels to fund it. A generational lark, he whispers, for the Zoomers and Millies who’ve got nothing better to do with their student loans. 🎩

Organized by the International Awards Associate (IAA), the MUSE Awards, in its 2025 Season 2, beheld over 13,000 entries, a testament to humanity’s unending quest for artistic glory. Submissions, judged by a pantheon of 100+ industry titans from 30 nations, were scrutinized for innovation, craftsmanship, and the audacity to stir the soul. 🎨✨

Oh, and Coinbase flung $375 million at Echo, that brainchild of crypto wizard Jordan Fish, aka Cobie in the digital wilds. They made this announcement on Tuesday, as if Tuesdays were suddenly the new golden hour for mergers. 🚀

South Korea’s ruling Democratic Party, led by Rep. Min Byung-dug, has escalated its campaign against Binance, questioning why the exchange’s acquisition of GOPAX proceeded without a repayment roadmap. During a National Policy Committee hearing, Min accused the Financial Services Commission of facilitating a merger “not backed by capital,” implying Binance secured GOPAX with promises as tangible as a mirage in the Sahara.

The market’s looking like a house of cards on a windy day, with trading volumes dropping faster than a hot potato. And don’t even get me started on volatility! If things don’t turn around soon, Bitcoin might just keep sinking like a lead balloon.