Cryptonews

Technical compression, a state of economic stasis, has seen ETH’s price confined to a narrow range, as if penned in by a particularly fussy gardener. During this period, volatility has been as subdued as a vicar at a jazz club, yet pressure simmers beneath the surface, threatening to erupt in a breakout or breakdown. Our trading desk, ever the keen observer, noted on daily ETH/USDT charts that small-bodied candles dominate, with repeated failed attempts to breach the $2,000 psychological level, a threshold so revered it’s akin to the Holy Grail of price points.

Mr. Pal says signals are beginning to align in a way that historically precedes explosive upside moves-like a dragon with a sugar rush.

Reports whisper that this venture, a mere 10 billion yen in size, is etched into a blockchain, that modern-day scribe of secrets, rather than the traditional securities parchment. One might say it is a marriage of the ancient and the absurd, where digital tokens waltz with paper money.

Oh, and let’s not forget the rollercoaster ride of 2026. Rejected at $2.40 in January, dumped to $1.11 by February-because why not? But hey, it found some “support” at that level. Support, my foot. It’s like saying a life raft is supporting you when you’re actually drowning.

Polymarket, the reigning king of speculative chaos, clocked 19.6 million weekly transactions by mid-February 2026. Kalshi, the slightly less popular cousin, managed 17.4 million. The rivalry is so intense, you’d think they were competing to see who can make crypto fans poorer faster.

Once upon a time, last week to be precise, there was a flicker of hope-a spark of life! But alas, that shiny dream has now tumbled down the rabbit hole, dragging the price down a whopping 10%. Quite the dramatic twist, wouldn’t you say?

On February 20, 2026, MARA France completed this delightful acquisition-after a formal thumbs-up from the French government. Who knew red tape could be so stylish? And let’s not forget NJJ Capital, which has jumped in with a cozy 10% stake in MARA France. Meanwhile, the EDF Group is still clinging on as a minority shareholder and primary customer, like a cat that refuses to let go of its favorite toy.

Well, I’ll be jiggered! SBI Holdings has whipped up a blockchain-based bond, tailor-made for the fellow who fancies a spot of retail investing. It’s a ripping combo of old-school fixed-income structure and digital asset jollity, with a mere $10 billion issuance. By Jove, this is a spiffing step forward for tokenized securities in the Land of the Rising Sun!

The 13F filings, those sacred scrolls of financial accountability, revealed a cold, unyielding truth: from 532K BTC in Q3 to 513K BTC in Q4. A mere 3.5%-a pebble in the path of a crumbling empire. Yet they still cling to over half a million BTC, as if the metal itself might exude salvation.

Spot ETF inflows are “steady” – which in crypto translates to “we’re either genius investors or delusional optimists. Jury’s out.” Altcoin demand? Let’s call it… enthusiastic. Or a Ponzi scheme. Time will tell.