Bitcoin Hits $113K? What the Hell Is Going On? 🚀💸

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Bitcoin’s Sunday “pump” is so wild, I’m half-expecting a televangelist to show up with a holy water bucket. 🤯💸 First time since Tuesday, which is basically the Stone Age in crypto time. What’s next, a 100% tariff on existential dread?

Enter US Secretary Bessent, who’s basically the human version of a “breaking news” alert. China’s “ready” to make a deal, which is just code for “we’re tired of your nonsense.” 🤷‍♂️ Trump’s 100% tariff? Let’s just say it’s the financial equivalent of a toddler’s tantrum.

BREAKING: US Treasury Secretary Bessent says China is “ready” to make a trade deal with the US after 2 days of negotiations. 🎯

Bessent says the agreement will remove President Trump’s 100% tariff set to go live November 1st. 🚨

– The Kobeissi Letter (@KobeissiLetter) October 26, 2025

Remember when Trump claimed China was “deceitful” and threatened a 100% tariff? That’s like a kid saying, “I’m gonna tell my dad!” and then actually doing it. 🤡

Now, the two superpowers are meeting in Europe. Meanwhile, their delegations are probably arguing over who’s gonna pay for the coffee. ☕

Reuters says the POTUS is “confident” of a deal. Because nothing says “confidence” like a 100% tariff. 🤝

The Kobeissi Letter calls this the “10th and final step” of Trump’s plan. Which is just a fancy way of saying, “We’re out of ideas, let’s try this.” 🌀

Most people are closed on Sunday, but crypto? That’s the only place where “pump and dump” is a legitimate business model. Bitcoin’s at $113K, which is higher than my self-respect. 🚀

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2025-10-26 15:19