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Oh, the 1-hour price chart! It’s a veritable farce of negative direction. Lower highs, lower lows-it’s like watching a bad sequel, but without the charm. 🌀😒 The poor thing can’t catch a break, can it?

Scaramucci spilled these pearls of wisdom during a SolanaFloor interview, all while the conference crowd sipped gin and tonic, no doubt. One can only imagine the drama. 🎤✨

With this acquisition, TenX aims to tame the wild validators of Solana and Sui, promising no downtime. Because, obviously, who needs sleep when you’re building a blockchain empire? 🛌🚫

Thursday wasn’t just any day, oh no-it was a feast for institutional money goblins! 🧛♂️💸 $63.86 million sloshed around ETFs like a witch’s cauldron, bubbling up digital asset hype. Binance, meanwhile, watched its XRP reserves vanish faster than a snozzcumber in a sweet shop. 🚨

Analysts are now asking: Will 2026 be Bitcoin’s version of “please don’t eat the yellow snow”? 🚫💩❄️ Or will it just hibernate like a bear with a hangover? 🐻💤

So, Pi Network (PI) token sashayed up to $0.2070, a 7% bounce from its weekly low. 🎉 But let’s not throw a parade just yet-it’s still a far cry from its ~$3 all-time high. And its market cap? Oh, it’s down to a humble $1.8 billion from a cool $20 billion. Humble brag, much? 💸

Now, Bitcoin bulls are scrappin’ like alley cats on a Friday, trying to break the curse of U.S. trading hour selloffs. It’s like trying to keep a frog in a wheelbarrow-every time they think they’ve got it, plop, off it goes. 🦎

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Ah, silver-sometimes called the devil’s metal, but really just misunderstood and slightly metallic. Throughout December, it kept the trend going, slowly climbing like a vine reaching for the sun, refusing to stop despite everyone’s attempts to clip its wings.

Selig’s 2023 Ode to XRP: A Ballad of Code and Spirits