jpyxx The decentralized exchange (DEX) and automated market maker (AMM) investigated what appeared to be faulty access control in its smart contracts, which allowed the attackers to withdraw funds directly from liquidity pools. It’s like having a treasure chest with a lock that’s been left open. 🔐💀
The downfall began, as all tragedies do, with a whisper. Technical fissures appeared across the charts, as subtle as a yawn in a silent theater. Bitcoin, once soaring above $103,000 like a proud eagle, now flutters downward, threatening to breach the $100,000 mark. Oh, the humiliation! The DeFi Report, ever the harbinger of doom, declares that while the rally looks splendid on parchment, the reality is as grim as a winter in Siberia. Below the 50, 100, and 200-day moving averages it sinks, like a stone in the Volga. These averages, once stalwart supporters, now turn their backs, signaling a fading bullish spirit. 😢📉
Bitcoin tumbled below $100,000 like a drunk man off a barstool, and might revisit its yearly open at $93,500-momentum’s as weak as a politician’s promise. 🥴
So, Mike Novogratz, the CEO of Galaxy (not the chocolate bar, sadly), has some thoughts on the crypto market. Apparently, it’s as sluggish as a Monday morning without coffee. ☕😴 Long-term holders are reallocating assets like they’re Marie Kondo-ing their portfolios. After a wild bull run, everyone’s diversifying because, you know, balance. 🧘♂️ But here’s the kicker: this is actually a good thing in the long run. Short term? It’s like throwing a wet blanket on a party. 🎉💦
SHIB’s been feeling a little adventurous. Despite everyone else plummeting into despair, it’s managed to creep up by a measly 1.77% over the past 24 hours. Oh, the excitement! 🤑
According to a survey by the Alternative Investment Management Association (AIMA) – a group of people who probably wear very expensive glasses and say words like “synergy” a lot – this is an 8% jump from last year. Progress, folks! Or is it just a fancy way of saying they’re chasing the next shiny thing? 🕶️💡
Whale Alert, that trusty watchdog of the blockchain, spotted a transfer of 126,791,448 XRP-enough to make a banker blush. At first glance, it looked like a whale just changed swimming lanes between unknown wallets. But dig a little deeper, and you’ll find both wallets belong to Evernorth Holdings, Ripple’s trusty XRP vault-keeper. 🕵️♂️
As the bears devour everything in their path, even the most optimistic prophets of the crypto world are forced to eat their words. Among them, Merlijn The Trader-oh, that name reeks of expertise and self-assurance-has become a voice of despair, a beacon of resignation. It seems he has thrown in the towel, waving it like a flag of surrender, muttering what we all secretly knew but dared not speak:
In a plot twist that’s more Larry David than Breaking Bad, Keonne Rodriguez, co-founder of the privacy-obsessed Samourai Wallet, is trading his laptop for a prison jumpsuit. Why? Because apparently, helping people keep their Bitcoin transactions private is a no-no when it involves drug lords and scammers. Who knew? 🤔
