jpyxx 
As of the fourth day of November, this fine feed reports a net asset value of a most respectable $25.70. It presents a most audacious feat: publicly auditable pricing that frees the astute gentlemen and ladies of finance to verify the fund’s true worth on-chain. What a salubrious development for the tender sensibilities of our monetary pursuits! 🤑
Ripple announced this shenanigan at the Ripple Swell 2025 gala in New York, where they’ll pilot RLUSD on the XRP Ledger (XRPL) to settle fiat card payments like a possum in a poker game. This follows Ripple’s recent $500 million treasure hunt. 💰
On November 5, Garlinghouse took to X (formerly known as Twitter…because we all love a rebrand) to announce that, despite the global crypto market’s “mild” panic attack recently, Ripple has had an absolute whirlwind of a year. And surprise! The $500 million funding didn’t just come from Fortress. Oh no. Brevan Howard and Marshall Wace also decided to hop on the Ripple train and invest in the future of crypto. 🚂💰
According to the latest whispers from Coinglass, the open interest (OI) in Bitcoin futures stands at a staggering 677,750 BTC-worth a comfortable $70.24 billion. That’s up by 3.47% in just 24 hours. The CME is still flexing with a $14.35 billion lead, though Binance isn’t far behind, with $12.45 billion in OI.
Whales, those greedy monsters, heave 400,000 Bitcoin into the abyss this October, causing waves of panic and ripples of doubt. Meanwhile, the jet-set crowd turns their gaze elsewhere-gold, AI, stablecoins-like restless children abandoning their toys in the mud. The market, ever fickle, trembles under the weight of leveraged liquidations. Truly, the chaos of capitalism knows no ground, no rhythm, just frantic pounding. 🐋💸
According to the announcement shared with Bitcoin.com News, the new platform dubbed iBuild operates on Injective’s MultiVM infrastructure, offering rapid deployment, cross-chain compatibility, and simplified creation tools that lower the barrier to entry for blockchain developers. 🏗️
The crypto market, that fickle mistress, liquidated a cool $1.7 billion in positions within a single day, with Bitcoin alone shedding $487 million. Traders, scarred by October’s flash crash, have retreated to their bunkers, their fingers hovering nervously over sell buttons. Seasonality, that once-reliable soothsayer, has abandoned them, leaving only silence and the faint scent of despair. 🤡
So, our dynamic duo-Zama and KKRT Labs-has agreed to pause their Netflix binges and accelerate the scalability of the Zama Protocol. Just picture it: the duo is aiming for the sky, hoping to squeeze out 10,000+ confidential transactions per second on beloved public chains like Ethereum and Solana, while the rest of us are still figuring out how to transfer our breakfast money to a friend. Talk about a tech advantage! 🚀
In a press release slicker than a greased pig, Hinkal announced its Invisible Wallet, a contraption designed to keep your digital dealings under wraps. Georgi Koreli, the big cheese at Hinkal, quipped, “Privacy’s a right, not a privilege. You wouldn’t hand your bank statement to a stranger, so why let your crypto transactions hang out like dirty laundry?” 🤔
Last month’s chaos was all about leveraged futures blowing up like overcooked popcorn. Now it’s the spot market’s turn to play pin-the-tail-on-the-bear-market 🎯. Spoiler: The tail is winning.
