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So, the ETFs are, once again, draining away. A total of $81.44 million departed on the 29th, according to Sosovalue. After those two brief, heartwarming days of inflows totaling $379.93 million, of course. Investor sentiment, it seems, is a fickle beast. One wonders what they were expecting.

Oh, the audacity! In an X post – a relic of a bygone age of fleeting thoughts – Saylor confessed to accumulating 17,732 BTC at a pitiable $9,882 per coin. Back then, the very notion of a cryptocurrency challenging the established order was met with polite scorn, with knowing shakes of the head from the gentlemen of finance. A paltry $175 million, they sniffed. A fool’s wager. Now? (And one can almost hear the grinding of teeth in the halls of central banks) That same stash, that act of defiance, is worth – try to contain your shock – nearly $1.95 billion. A gain, they say, of over 1,000%. Such arithmetic is… unsettling. 🧐

It couldn’t even manage to flirt with $205. Pathetic, really. Honestly, beating Bitcoin and Ethereum on the way down is… an achievement? I’m questioning everything. It dipped below $200. Then $198. Officially in a “mood.”

“Stablecoins are the devil, they’ll destroy bank lendin’!” they holler. 🙄 But Coinbase’s policy czar, Faryar Shirzad, ain’t havin’ it. “Nonsense!” he declares, “Most stablecoin demand’s comin’ from folks overseas, not your local farmer lookin’ to stash his piggy bank savings.” 🏦🚫

Woe betide those who underestimate the power of these oceanic creatures; Ethereum’s whales must be akin to Tolstoyan characters, rarely making mere ripples in their wake. Just as whispers of war could shake the spirits along the great corridors of Russian history, so did Bitmine’s acquisition spark fervent whispers among market watchmen. Indeed, transactions of over $1 million enjoyed a sharp incline on the lands of digital metrics sharing, revealing speculations reminiscent of vast bazaars from an era unknown.

21Shares, with trembling fingers and a heart full of ambition, has flung its Form S-1 across the desk of the SEC, demanding immediate action. This proposed Hyperliquid ETF, if blessed by the bureaucratic gods, shall grant investors regulated access to a realm where HYPE tokens dance to the tune of chaos. A masterstroke? A gamble? Only time will whisper the answer. 🎲

Cocoon offers a new approach to AI, moving away from the current model of large companies controlling all the data and computing power. Instead, it will utilize the spare processing power from individual computers, rewarding those who contribute with Toncoin (TON). This creates a more open, community-based system for AI development and computation.

Eighty million souls, or thereabouts, are now granted access to Hyperliquid’s coffers, a place brimming with liquidations, programmable trickery, and the shifting of wealth across chains. One shudders to think of the complexities! It doth transform Bitget Wallet into a portal, a gateway if you will, for the $HYPE token – a name, I confess, that lacks a certain… refinement.

The competition was fiercer than a dragon guarding its treasure, with payments firms scrambling to snatch a slice of the crypto pie. 🥧 And thanks to clearer rules in the US and Europe, even the most cautious bankers were daring to dream of digital-asset treats. 🎉