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XRP’s upward move above $2.050 and $2.080 has been nothing short of a spectacle, outpacing Bitcoin and Ethereum with the flair of a seasoned performer. 🎭 The price then surged past $2.20, only to take a brief bow and retreat-how dramatic! 🙃
Ethereum, imitating its elder brother Bitcoin, has deigned to recover slightly, crawling above $2,800 and then $2,850. Such obedience! One almost expects a little bow.
Per the October market crash (because what’s crypto without a US-China tariff Oscars night?), XRP’s been tossed into the Great Recession of digital assets. Billions liquidated, exchanges disagreed on prices, and poor souls like you are now asking, “Did I just buy potato salad for crypto?”
In an act of digital rebellion, XRP burst forth with a 13% spike-a rare, splendid spectacle where volume and on-chain payments rose in chorus, like a well-rehearsed opera of chaos. This wasn’t your regular pump-and-dump; no, this was a true rally, born amidst the lowest ebb of XRP’s declining channel. The green candle flickered like a firefly-small but mighty-marking a brief respite in the ongoing saga of downward despair.
Imagine this: after years of dancing on regulatory tiptoes and whispering sweet nothings in the Gray Zone, Polymarket is finally handed a shiny permission slip by the U.S. Commodity Futures Trading Commission (CFTC). It’s like being invited to the cool kids’ club-except this club enforces rules and probably makes you wear your regulation bow tie. 😊
Texas formally entered the bitcoin arena on Nov. 20, 2025. Imagine the scene: a state with cowboy spirit and now, a bit of cyber cowboy bravado, deploying surplus funds to acquire BTC via Blackrock’s ETF. Because, why not? The move is inspired by Senate Bill 21, signed in June 2025, which somehow tried to make the reserve sound noble-long-term hedge, they say. In reality, it’s probably just a way to keep up with digital Joneses. The allocation is hardly a fortune-about 0.0004% of Texas’ biennial budget-but even small farmers dream big, don’t they? This step boldly sets Texas apart from the traditional asset management crowd, shrugging off boring bonds in favor of the snazzy world of digital assets.
Ah, the sweet sound of another $130 million being pulled from the depths of Metaplanet’s Bitcoin-backed credit. The company’s latest attempt to fuel its ever-growing Bitcoin obsession and, as a cherry on top, keep its stock price from hitting rock bottom, is nothing short of an elaborate dance with destiny (and some very volatile assets). 🍿
Ash Crypto, that modern-day oracle, presents a chart as if it were a sacred text, revealing Bitcoin’s fidelity to a rising trendline since 2021. Three times it has been rebuffed, like a suitor denied at the altar, only to return with renewed vigor. Now, it stands above, transformed from foe to ally, a testament to the fickle nature of markets. “As long as BTC holds above this trendline, the long-term outlook stays bullish,” Ash proclaims, though one wonders if even the stars can predict such whims. 🕊️🔮
Here’s the thing. This whole thing was announced Monday-by Standard Chartered, mind you, through CryptoMoon (I know, who comes up with these names?)-and Margaret Harwood-Jones, who’s big in the bank’s financing and securities services, is all excited. She said the collaboration is a chance for the bank to show off its “expertise” in the fast-paced digital asset world. Translation: “We know what we’re doing, trust us.” But the question is, did 21Shares need the help? They were just fine with their previous partner, Zodia Custody. In fact, they’d been cozy with Zodia since June, which just happens to be a crypto-native custodian co-founded by-you guessed it-Standard Chartered in 2020. Oh, the drama! 🙄
In a post as dramatic as a Lancre Morris dance, Sapijiju dismissed the claims by Lookonchain as “complete tosh,” insisting their dealings with Kraken and Circle were as innocent as a witch’s cackle. “Mere treasury management, I say!” they proclaimed, though one might suspect they’re just rearranging deckchairs on the good ship Pump.fun. 🛳️🤹♂️
