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In a statement that reads like a soap opera, Swihart claims the Bootstrap board is “misaligned” with Zcash’s mission. Names like Zaki Manian and Christina Garman are now the villains of this story. “They changed the rules mid-game,” Swihart says, as if that’s a new concept. 😤

Last year, the numbers sang: a 72% leap to $33 trillion, a crescendo fueled by institutional embrace. Bloomberg, citing Artemis Analytics, painted the canvas, though one suspects the brush was dipped in hyperbole. 🎨

House Bill 1039, penned by the intrepid Representative John Snyder, seeks to create this reserve, while its companions, SB 1040 and SB 1038, introduced by Senator Joe Gruters, dance in perfect bureaucratic harmony. All this, mind you, under the watchful eye of President Trump’s executive order from March 2025, establishing a federal Strategic Bitcoin Reserve. Oh, the folly of it all! 🦅📜

According to the ever-reliable Bloomberg, this august institution aims to unveil a crypto wallet in the latter half of 2026. The aspiration? To entwine the venerable customs of old-world finance with the shimmering allure of the digital frontier-a curious sort of alchemy. As if mixing a fine cognac with sparkling soda, one might say. Meanwhile, they also plan to dazzle the masses by launching crypto trading on ETrade before mid-year. Competition? Of course! But with MetaMask’s reputation so firmly entrenched, one can only wonder whether Morgan Stanley’s new venture will be more than just a dashing costume ball. 🥂🤔

At its core, BRD is backed by Brazilian National Treasury securities-a bold move that skips the real’s value and goes straight for the interest. Because who needs stability when you can have 15% yields? Brazil’s central bank, in their infinite wisdom, has set rates so high they could rival the Eiffel Tower. 🗼💸

The noble crusaders of the Kaiser Foundation, those champions of health, found themselves embroiled in a lawsuit filed in June 2024, alleging that they had cleverly hidden some code on their digital platforms. This little trick allowed nosy third parties to snoop around, gathering juicy tidbits like “patient status” and “identifying information”-because who doesn’t want to know what you Googled while waiting for your prescription? 🤔

Cyvers, those eagle-eyed guardians of the crypto realm, claim their fancy monitoring systems caught a whiff of something rotten. A single address, as sly as a fox, snaffled up 8,535 ETH, labeled with the oh-so-innocent tag “Truebit Protocol: Purchase.” Hmm, purchase indeed! 🧐

Yes, indeed! That little digital ripple from San Francisco has managed to leapfrog BNB and climb to third place in the market charts. Who knew that a token tied to a big fancy blockchain could be so feisty?

Well, well, well-Vitalik Buterin, the enfant terrible of blockchain, has once again set the world alight with his latest musings. On the 8th of January, no less, he declared Ethereum to be the lovechild of Linux and BitTorrent. How utterly charming! 🥂

Vitalik, ever the idealist, discussed Ethereum’s lofty goal: maximum autonomy without intermediaries, while still wooing the masses and earning the trust of institutions. A tall order, one might say, like asking a cat to herd sheep. 🐱🐑