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Bitcoin’s next big move might have less to do with blockchain buzzwords and more to do with whether the world’s most expensive commodity decides to stay humble.

Key Takeaways:

Canary Capital, in a stroke of either genius or sheer lunacy, has filed a registration statement with the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) for the Canary PEPE ETF. This proposed ETF promises to bring the wild world of PEPE to your brokerage account-because who doesn’t want to gamble on a frog-themed coin?

The incident, which had the nation glued to its screens faster than you can say “federal investigation,” was quickly picked up by KCRA Sacramento. And just when you thought it couldn’t get more riveting, the FBI swooped in, taking over the investigation like a Hollywood production, with all the suspense you could ever need.

With its structure weakening faster than my resolve to go to the gym, the risk of a deeper breakdown is looming. Will it pull itself together, or will it crumble like a poorly baked soufflé? Only time will tell, but one thing’s for sure: the next move is as decisive as my commitment to avoiding eye contact with my neighbors.

Tokenized assets on BNB Chain hit an all-time high and more than doubled from last year, according to Token Terminal. Forget gradual adoption-this is like a rocket launch with confetti cannons. Flat in 2024, BOOM mid-2025, and no brakes applied.

The California Employment Development Department, in all its bureaucratic glory, is the primary source for the official job cuts. The affected campuses? Meta’s Burlingame campus on Airport Boulevard and Sunnyvale campus on Discovery Way, with the terminations scheduled for May 22 and May 29, respectively. Meta, ever the model of transparency, has called this round of cuts “standard operational planning”-a term so vague it could mean anything, really. But don’t worry, they didn’t bother to specify which teams or roles would bear the brunt of this “planning.”

The fellowship, announced with great fanfare on April 6, is billed as “a pilot program to support independent safety and alignment research and develop the next generation of talent.” Fellows shall labor from Constellation’s Berkeley workspace or remotely, their efforts remunerated at $3,850 per week, over $200,000 annualized, plus roughly $15,000 in monthly compute. Applications close on May 3, and the program is not confined to AI specialists; OpenAI casts its net wide, ensnaring talents from cybersecurity, social science, and human-computer interaction alongside computer science. A veritable smorgasbord of expertise!

After nine months of work rebuilding its AI technology – now organized under a new division called Superintelligence Labs – Meta has launched a new model called Muse Spark. This effort followed Mark Zuckerberg’s commitment to making advanced AI widely available and to compete with companies like OpenAI and Google. According to Meta, they redesigned their systems and streamlined processes to achieve performance similar to their previous model, Llama 4 Maverick, but using significantly less computing power. They see Muse Spark as the first in a series of increasingly powerful models. Meta is also focusing on specific areas where AI can excel, like healthcare. They believe many people use AI for health and wellness information, and this is an area where they can create a better experience than general-purpose chatbots.

The conclusions rely upon the patterns of speech and early discussions in cryptographic circles, rather than any proof that could be laid on a drawing-room mantel. Notwithstanding the assertions, the article declines to pronounce Mr. Back as Nakamoto with any certainty.