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Behold, the Altcoin Season Index, once a proud 55 in July, now lies prostrate at 21, as if struck by a curse from the dark arts. CMC data reveals this tragedy, as altcoins perform their swan song while Bitcoin (BTC) watches with cold indifference. 🦢💔
Apparently, losing a spot in MSCI’s indexes is like getting uninvited to the coolest club in town. JPMorgan’s analysts (the folks who predict doom with a straight face 😱) say Strategy, a Bitcoin treasury firm, could lose a cool $2.8 billion if MSCI goes full Grinch. Michael Saylor, Strategy’s chair, is already on the phone with MSCI, probably saying, “Hey, you’re making a yuge mistake!” 📞
Apparently, these prosecutors – very serious people, I’m sure – are telling a judge that this whole TerraUSD collapse was… bad. Disruptive! And it somehow caused other crypto things to fall apart. Like a domino effect. Honestly, it sounds exhausting. 🙄
Beware, for the shadowy analyst Mags, cloaked in pseudonym and paranoia, suggests that Ethereum is merely reenacting its past – that is, quite possibly, preparing for a fireworks display worthy of New Year’s Eve. According to this oracle:
In a Dec. 5 market update, Butterfill spoke with the solemnity of a prophet, asserting that Tether’s solvency concerns “look misplaced,” as though the company were a phoenix rising from the ashes of doubt. 🦅
On the fateful day of Dec. 5, Zcash, that recalcitrant phoenix, rose above the $375 mark, its wings singed but unbowed, after a verbal joust between its founder, the erudite Eli Ben-Sasson, and the Bitcoin bard Michael Saylor. Oh, the drama! The Bitcoin maximalists, with their monocles and manifestos, declare altcoins to be but shadows, vulnerable to the whims of market puppeteers. How quaintly absurd! 🌪️💎
The bill, a humble attempt to align Poland with the EU’s Markets in Crypto-Assets (MiCA) framework, was rejected by Nawrocki for allegedly threatening civil freedoms, adding murky domain-blocking powers, and imposing fees that would make even a Polish grandmother clutch her zloty. 🧓💰 According to a local outlet, the president’s stance was as firm as a well-made kielbasa, leaving the government in a regulatory pickle. 🌭🤷♂️
In the shadowed corridors of global finance, where the air hums with the whispers of gold and silver, the Basel Committee stirs once more. Like a sleepwalker jolted awake, it fiddles with its rulebook, now as outdated as a typewriter in a world of quantum computing. The rise of stablecoins-those digital Januses, pegged to dollars yet dancing in crypto’s wild tavern-has left regulators clutching their brows. A 1,250% risk weight? Oh, how quaint! The U.S. and U.K. have scoffed at such medieval numerology, though one wonders if their own fiscal houses are too shaky to judge.
Let’s start with the price action: SHIB is still falling beneath the 50, 100 and 200 critical moving averages, all of which are angled downward. Every attempt at a bounce is promptly sold into. The chart is still locked in a distinct downtrend with lower highs and lower lows. This structure indicates exhaustion rallies inside a dominant bearish channel rather than accumulation. Any upward movement is noise rather than a change in trend until SHIB recovers at least the 50-day EMA and breaks above the cluster around $0.00095-$0.00105. 🦄😢
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