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But fear not! In a twist that would make even the most jaded analyst raise an eyebrow, Ethereum has lazily thrown out a shiny new pattern-behold, the bullish falling wedge. It’s like the crypto market’s version of a teenager’s awkward growth spurt: promising, but nobody’s quite sure if it’ll stick around.

According to the wise and somewhat sarcastic sentinels of sentiment, Santiment, the market’s current yields-those measly 4%-are akin to a miser counting coins while the kingdom burns. Their insight? The market has not yet reached the zenith of overindulgence; instead, it lingers in the calm before the storm, ready for Ether to make a spirited climb back up, maybe even to that sweet resistance of $3,200. Who knew that stablecoins, those seemingly dull financial ornaments, could serve as the weather vanes of market health, hinting when the frenzy might resume? 🍃

Oh Kyung-seok, CEO of Dunamu (parent company of Upbit – there’s always a parent company, isn’t there?), issued an announcement on November 28th. It stated, in a manner somewhat lacking in cheer, that the platform had been… compromised. Digital asset deposits and withdrawals were suspended, and a structural overhaul of wallet operations commenced. A structural overhaul! That’s what they always say, isn’t it? Like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic, but with more polygons.

“Why,” you ask, “does the market yawn while institutions drool?” Ah, dear reader, it’s all in the rules-a red-tape labyrinth where ETF managers must buy XRP like peasants at a bazaar, not aristocrats haggling in secret. No private deals, no backroom handshakes. Just open-market chaos, where whales, retail investors, and ETFs jostle like drunkards in a tavern. And what’s the result? A supply war, my friends, as Binance’s XRP reserves plummet to levels that would make a miser weep. 🐳📉

Despite the influx of capital, a veritable deluge of nearly a billion dollars, XRP’s price remains as unmoved as a chess grandmaster contemplating his next sacrifice. This, my dear reader, is no mere coincidence but a symphony of market conditions and institutional whimsy. History, that fickle mistress, suggests a gradual crescendo rather than a sudden fortissimo. 🎻📈

So, the big wigs in China’s financial and law enforcement scene have had a meeting. What did they talk about? Well, nothing too surprising – just doubling down on their zero-tolerance policy for cryptocurrencies. Apparently, some people thought they could slip by with a little bit of crypto speculation. Spoiler alert: they were wrong. 😅

Just last week, the coin did something unexpected: it rallied, as if waking from a long, bitter nap, reclaiming the mighty $90,000 support level. An expert, whose fame might be exaggerated, claims the market performance is better than the charts-they always say that, don’t they? Perhaps they believe Bitcoin is more than just a glorified rollercoaster that occasionally dips into a deep hole. 🎢

Biometric tech, for the uninitiated, uses your physical features-your voice, your fingerprints, your beautiful mug-to verify your identity. Sure, you could just use a password, but who wants to remember that? These systems are popping up on exchanges like they’re going out of style. But why? Well, it’s pretty straightforward: fraudsters have gotten pretty good at stealing identities, and crypto exchanges are trying to make sure they don’t get in on the action.

Imagine the Net Realized Profit and Loss as the wallet’s emotional rollercoaster-up, down, and now… flat. When Bitcoin sells for a profit, the holders are smirking; when they’re at a loss, well, tears may follow. Between November 22 and 24, the market did a dramatic dance-positive here, negative there, like a child on a sugar high. But since November 25, it’s like everyone just agreed to take a chill pill-tinged with a dash of ‘we’ll see,’ as the values sit jazzed at near-zero. Ah, the sweet relief after the storm! It’s a typical transition from the chaos of capitulation to the peaceful waiting of a potential trend revival-ay, the promises of the crypto gods.

Historically, such a ritual has heralded a tempest of selling, as if the very air were thick with the whispers of past crashes. Now, the investors, those self-proclaimed sages, have taken to hoarding their assets in self-custody, while the exchanges, those gilded temples of liquidity, swell with a tide of BTC. A paradox, my dear reader, where the faithful are both the savior and the executioner.