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After a recent tumble, Bitcoin is now trying to climb out of its local range high and reclaim the $111,000 zone as if it’s a lost teddy bear 🧸. September saw BTC retest the $107,000 range low before bouncing 4% to the local upper boundary. Analyst Ali Martinez, who probably has more charts than a pirate has treasure maps 🗺️, noted that BTC has been trading in a descending channel on the 4-hour chart for the past two weeks. On Tuesday morning, it broke above the pattern’s upper boundary around $110,700. Fancy that!

Thunes, whose latest Valentine’s gift to humanity is a “Smart Superhighway” allowing money to jet around the globe like it’s braving the currents of the Amazon, is now bolting blockchain and digital expansion rails onto their already magnificent Direct Global Network. Once upon a time, these things needed miracle workers called banks-which, let’s face it, love to keep cash waiting just long enough to forget where you parked. These pioneering lovebirds, by unifying Thunes’ pipeline of wealth and Ripple’s fancy blockchain inclinations, expect the likes of banks, fintechs, and crypto-troubadours to have their funds whisked away at unprecedented speeds. And, they say, all within any rickety banking system you can imagine.

Apparently, after a chat with the Financial Times (which, let’s be honest, probably involved more jargon than a Star Trek convention), Dalio felt the need to clarify his remarks. 🗞️🤦‍♂️ He took to social media-because where else do you go to set the record straight?-to share the actual Q&A, complete with a side of “please stop misrepresenting me.” 📱🤨

The exchange, with all the subtlety of a bull in a china shop, dropped this bombshell during the wee hours when most folks were still dreamin’ of lambos and moon pies. Faster than you can say “bear market,” prices went south quicker than a snowbird in December.

On Sept. 2, the Linea Consortium, those benevolent overlords of blockchain, announced this grand experiment. They aim to shower liquidity providers with tokens, hoping to coax more than $1 billion into their coffers. All transactions are secured by Brevis zero-knowledge proofs, ensuring transparency-or at least the illusion thereof. After all, what is modern finance if not a theater of illusions? 🎩✨

But hey, while you’re busy stacking ETH like it’s going out of style, your stock performance is about as exciting as watching paint dry. 😴 Investors are yawning harder than a cat on a Sunday afternoon, especially with September kicking off like a wet blanket on a bonfire. 🔥❌

Dans son dernier billet sur X, Martinez partage un motif technique formé dans le graphique quotidien de Toncoin. Il s’agit d’un triangle, figure géométrique qui apparaît lorsqu’un actif se consolide entre deux lignes de tendance convergentes. Comme dans toute bonne tragédie, ce triangle a ses variantes : l’ascendant, le descendant, et le symétrique, celui-ci étant notre protagoniste du jour.

Picture this: Yunfeng Financial Group, a Hong Kong-listed company with ties to none other than Chinese billionaire Jack Ma, has just splashed $44 million on 10,000 ETH. That’s right, folks-a whopping pile of Ether, enough to make even Scrooge McDuck jealous. Where did they get the cash? Oh, just “internal reserves,” because apparently, billionaires have spare millions lying around like loose change under the couch cushions.

Bitcoin, once a shining beacon of hope and riches, is now stumbling along, barely hanging on to dear life. The once-promised $100,000 is now under threat. The charts? Oh, they say it’s all downhill from here. BTC tried to reclaim some glory above $120,000, but alas, it failed miserably. The $100,000 mark now looms like an ominous shadow, and it might just fade into history. Can you hear the faint cries of traders who thought they’d make it big? I can almost hear them now…

Ethereum’s fees and DApp activity have surged, leaving Tron and Solana in the dust. 🏃‍♂️💨