jpyxx

it’s about as secure as your grandma’s secret cookie recipe. To your average pension fund, other crypto assets are like lottery tickets-interesting, but let’s not get too crazy, shall we? It’s Bitcoin that will power the next phase like a well-oiled machine. ⚙️

Market people, the ones with the charts and the fancy coffee, say things might get a little wild by late 2025. And hey, on-chain stuff? Still chugging along, like your grandma’s old car, but hey – it moves!

The spectacle commenced when an XRP enthusiast, either emboldened by too much caffeine or a little too much idealism, commented beneath Ripple’s promotional spectacle, cheekily asserting that Ripple and XRP “are but mere acrobats” compared to the magnificent Solana, cheekily tagging both Solana and Western Union while doing so. This wherefore-inspiring remark appeared just as the townsfolk learned of Western Union’s latest glamourous dance troupe: creating a new stablecoin atop Solana’s stage.

The notion that Bitcoin’s ascent to the staggering figure of 180k could serve as the ultimate ‘push’ for XRP has caught the imagination of some market wizards. Watching the crypto circus, one might think it’s all just a big game of musical chairs-except instead of chairs, it’s institutional interests, regulatory whims, and a dash of limelight for XRP. 🪑✨

Merlijn The Trader, a man whose name sounds like a forgotten wizard from Norse mythology, proclaimed, “ETHEREUM JUST FLIPPED RESISTANCE INTO SUPPORT,” as though witnessing a miracle akin to water turning into wine-except it’s Fibonacci levels turning into gospel. “The red box was the final boss,” he added, because clearly, Ethereum has been leveling up like a crypto RPG character. 🎮⚔️

Exchange-traded fund Canary Funds has filed an updated S-1 (a key registration document with the SEC) for an XRP ETF. In that update, the issuer removed something called a “delaying amendment.” This essentially means that the filing automatically becomes effective after 20 days. 🕒

Back on August 19, ZEC was humbly priced at $34.59. Fast forward to today, and it’s flipping coins left and right like a pancake chef on Red Bull. It’s now outranked poor Shiba Inu (SHIB), the once-mighty meme coin, and even Monero (XMR), the former king of privacy coins. Monero, you’ve been dethroned-pass the crown and the tissues. 😢

Technical indicators are throwing their hands up, screaming, “This is a dumpster fire!” 🔥📉 If you thought this downtrend could politely wait in line, you’ve clearly never owned a crypto wallet.

In a post on X (formerly Twitter, but we all know it’s just a way for people to vent), MEXC’s Chief Strategy Officer, Cecilia Hsueh, confessed that the exchange had, and I quote, “f*-ed up.” Yeah, that’s the exact wording, folks. In July, MEXC decided to freeze a cool $3.1 million of the White Whale’s funds, supposedly due to some “risk control rules” that, well, seemed more like a glitch in the matrix.

There it hangs, our dear DOGE, like a trapeze artist grasping a frayed rope, teetering near its crucial support zone. The meme-inspired marvel currently trades at a modest $0.18, a figure that reflects an 11% weekly decline. The culprits? Declining active addresses and the fickle whims of whales, those leviathans of the crypto sea, who have chosen to abandon ship. Yet, in this drama of highs and lows, one cannot help but marvel at the resilience of this digital curio. 🌊