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Ah, profit-takers, the devious little gremlins in our financial story! Their mischievous antics are increasing selling pressure faster than a cat runs from a bath, with sell volume now outstripping buy volume. If this continues, we might as well start planning for a drop down to the ominous $0.0077 support. 😱

Our gallant leader, CEO Vlad Tenev-bless him!-proclaimed with all the fervor of a passionate poet: “For decades, wealthy individuals and their elite institutions have thrived in clandestine and murky waters, while the humble retail investor has remained unjustly shackled on the shores of the great capital sea!” Behold! With a triumphant flourish of his metaphorical pen, he assures us that Robinhood Ventures will lay bare the treasures once guarded by the shiny suits of Wall Street. Money will stream like a river, or at least that’s the promise! Rivers, however, can also flood… 🏞️

According to the rather enthusiastic announcement, our dear group’s mission is nothing short of magnificent: they aim to make Ethereum the favored settlement and coordination layer for the ever-so-trendy artificial intelligence (AI). This effort elegantly bifurcates into two tracks: enabling AI agents to engage in financial transactions and collaborate onchain, while simultaneously constructing a delightful decentralized AI stack to keep those pesky gatekeepers at bay. The team dreams of working closely with the revered Ethereum Foundation (EF) and showering public goods upon the ecosystem for a speedy adoption. 🎉

So Tether’s USDT-the king of stablecoins if you ask anyone who pretends to know crypto-decided to put on its rocket boots right on Tron’s blockchain. This was spotted by some market guru named Darkfost (yeah, I know, sounds like a Blizzard character), who’s been eyeballing some fancy “Correlation Index” thingy relating to USDT supply and Tron price.

Today, Ripple-the company that’s been more in the news than a soap opera-announced this grand gesture to two nonprofits, Accion Opportunity Fund and Hire Heroes USA. The goal? To make small business owners feel like they’ve won the lottery (minus the actual cash) and to give veterans a leg up in the job market. Because, as we all know, nothing solves unemployment like a stablecoin. 💼💸

Prediction markets have finally gone mainstream, folks. On a Monday that felt like a Thursday (because time is an illusion, obviously), Stocktwits-the social media platform with more retail traders than there are complaints about the restaurant at the end of the universe-teamed up with Polymarket, the prediction market so big, it makes the Magrathea look like a small moon. 🌕💹

“We shall dabble in the arcane arts of token creation,” Pollak proclaimed at the BaseCamp gathering, his voice dripping with the gravitas of a man who knows the fickle whims of the crypto gods. 🎭

According to the ever-so-grand PVARA (Pakistan Virtual Asset Regulatory Authority, darling), this call to arms comes via an Expression of Interest process, hot on the heels of the newly minted Virtual Assets Ordinance. 📜 How very official! One can almost hear the quills scratching in anticipation.

Ki Young Ju, the CEO of CryptoQuant, took to Twitter to share this rather spectacular tidbit of information. Between 2009 and 2024, Bitcoin managed to pull in a humble $435 billion. But, in the short span of a mere 1.5 years, from 2024 to 2025, the number skyrocketed to $625 billion. It’s almost as if Bitcoin’s a teenager that spent 15 years awkwardly growing up and suddenly discovered its entrepreneurial spirit.

So, here’s the thing: crypto ETFs had a *stellar* week. Like, it was *unreal*. Bitcoin and Ether ETFs both made big moves, closing deep in the green. Apparently, fresh capital flooded in like a tidal wave, with Bitcoin ETFs raking in $2.34 billion, and Ether ETFs trying to catch up with $638 million. What a time to be alive! 😏