jpyxx

Indeed, the recent exuberance of Bitcoin’s value has shown itself to be underpinned by a splendidly advantageous pattern known as a bullish flag, splendidly illustrated upon the daily chart, just shy of the exalted $117,335 Fibonacci retracement level. This technical marvel follows a rather astonishing leap from the rather humble support zone of $98,000, and it couples delightfully with an ascending trendline, all while embracing the 50-day simple moving average (SMA) that rests amicably near $113,157 – a location of significance that has historically summoned profit-seeking reinforcements.

Polygon (POL) token, the little engine that could, chugged along for seven straight days, reaching heights not seen since the halcyon days of July 23. 🌄

Well, I’ll be jiggered! Sygnum Bank, the crème de la crème of Swiss digital asset banks, has decided to give the Sui blockchain a bit of the old razzle-dazzle. 🕺 Now, they’re not just sitting pretty with custody, trading, and lending for SUI tokens-oh no! They’re rolling out the red carpet for professional and institutional chaps who fancy a bit of blockchain brilliance. With their spiffing secure and regulated platform, Sygnum’s making Sui as accessible as a butler with a silver tray, all while giving international finance a jolly good boost. 🌍✨

In their latest memo, which I’m sure they wrote while sipping lattes and wearing perfectly tailored suits, Morgan Stanley points out that the dollar had its worst first half since 1973. That’s like saying it’s been having a worse year than my last SNL sketch. 😂

Picture this: 2024 dawns upon the stage, and out steps a DeFi protocol born from the lofty mind of none other than… Donald Trump himself! Managed with paternal finesse by his sons, Eric and Donald Jr., it’s a spectacle designed to make the financial world blink twice. The imitation gold coin, WLFI, was launched with the fanfare of a presidential inauguration-raising a modest $2.7 million in October, enough to buy a small island or at least a fancy yacht or two. And in the year of confusion 2025, a dollar-pegged stablecoin called USD1 made its debut, because nothing screams “serious money” quite like a coin tied to the greenback’s ego. 💵🤹‍♂️

According to the wise folk at CoinGlass – a name that sounds more like a crystal ball than a data provider – traders betting against XRP got their tails kicked hard. In one hour, they lost $281,180, a staggering surge of liquidations, up by a whopping 54,781%, or as I like to call it, “a hell of a shindig.” The cause? XRP, previously lounging at $3.21, decided to strut up to $3.36, forcing the shorts to skedaddle, often leaving wallets lighter than a feather in a hurricane.

According to a report from Reuters, China’s central bank quite unabashedly spent a hearty $1.06 billion on shiny yellow stuff in July. That marks nine consecutive months of it behaving like a gold-obsessed squirrel hoarding acorns. Perhaps they’re preparing for something; maybe a gold-themed Monopoly game? 🥇

Yesterday, the wizards at Coinbase announced this grand feat, promising to make on-chain trading as simple and secure as waving a wand. 🪄 This means that traders can now waltz into the world of Base network assets on decentralized exchanges, blending Coinbase’s trusted interface with the whimsical world of DeFi. The magic is already spreading across the land, reaching US customers everywhere-except the dark and dreary state of New York, where regulatory goblins still hold sway. But fear not, the spell is set to expand to more markets and networks in the coming months, casting its light far and wide.

And here’s the kicker: Hoskinson’s all hyped up about the “ton of new people” flocking to Cardano because of this airdrop. You know, like when you toss a bunch of candy into a crowd, and suddenly everyone’s your best friend. But instead of candy, it’s tokens. I’m sure the crypto community is *thrilled*.

Short sellers, those poor deluded souls, have been trampled underfoot like so many daisies in a stampede, with $105 million in liquidations on Friday alone. Eric Trump, ever the wit, quipped that bearish traders shall be “run over” if they persist in their folly. One can almost hear the schadenfreude in his voice. Meanwhile, Ether has continued its rampage, liquidating over $200 million in the past 24 hours. What a bloodbath! 🩸📉