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As announced on an unsuspecting Tuesday, this newfound partnership allows users to transform their stablecoin whims into 25 distinct fiat currencies. Yes, you heard that right—convert stablecoins like it’s going out of fashion! 🎩

The grand total? Over 913,000 ETH lost in the ether—pun intended—up nearly 44% from the previous year. And if that wasn’t enough, a whopping 5.3 million ETH have been torched by network fees, making the total lost or incinerated more than 6.2 million coins. That’s roughly 5% of all ETH ever created, binned like last week’s leftovers. It’s like Ethereum is playing a giant game of ‘Where’s Waldo?’ but instead of Waldo, it’s a wallet full of digital gold.

After a rather flirty surge from $112,000, Bitcoin is doing the cha-cha in a shiny new triangle pattern. Isn’t it adorable? 💃 But fear not! It’s not like this triangle gossip will linger as long as last season’s love drama. Although, I wouldn’t be shocked if Bitcoin just decided to ignore the triangle and go rogue on us instead. Who doesn’t love a plot twist?

So, what’s behind this grand performance? Some say it’s the new developments. Others claim it’s the growing interest, but frankly, it’s hard to ignore that something rather fabulous is afoot. Shall we investigate?

As of July 22, the charming upstart had donned the ticker symbol GS9 for its debut, charming the euros out of investors without the need for any new shares—how delightfully efficient! One can only imagine the confetti raining down as the stock initiated its dance on the exchange floor, all while securing its existing residence on Sweden’s NGM Nordic Growth Market under the equally alluring ticker H100. Is there any stopping this trendy venture as it captivates not just Scandinavia, but the broader European banking elite? The potential for international intrigue looms…

And then came Solana ($SOL). Ah, Solana. That fever dream of speed and, shall we say, enthusiasm. Up 45% this month, a modest 2.07% today. A veritable rocket launch by the standards of those who have seen it all crumble before. It always was, and likely shall remain, the haven of the… shall we call them “optimistic” tokens – those born of whimsy and fervent hope. The recent launch of $PUMP on pump.fun? A testament to the enduring spirit of the meme. A grand spectacle, truly. 🎭

The villain of this tale? ARK Invest’s ARKB, tumbling down the rabbit hole with a dramatic $77.46 million outflow recorded in just 24 hours. 😱 Grayscale’s GBTC wasn’t far behind, losing $36.75 million in a puff of smoke, while Fidelity’s FBTC bit the dust with a more modest $12.75 million exit. Oh, the drama! According to the wise sages at SoSoValue, it seems our funds just can’t take the heat anymore.

According to crypto.news (aka the gossip column of the blockchain world) on July 22, 2025, Ethereum decided to drop about 2.6% in the last 24 hours. Trading near $3,692? More like trading near my patience limit. ETH slid from its high of $3,845 this week, hitting an intraday low of $3,646 before bouncing back like a toddler on a trampoline. This little dip triggered liquidations across major exchanges, and let’s just say, short-term sentiment is *not* having a great day. 🎢

This frightfully plebeian altcoin believes itself poised for greatness, relying entirely on the kindness of stranger markets. How quaint! Though I must admit, watching altcoins scramble for attention is more entertaining than summer stock theatre.

Ah, Dogecoin [DOGE], the little shiba that could! In a strange twist of fate, it’s led the revolution of the memecoins, puffing up by a staggering 77% this July—becoming the largest rally in the top three memecoins by market capitalization. As anyone who’s ever owned a cat can tell you, this is indeed a feat worthy of a minimum of three gold stars and an unflattering meme. 📈✨