Altcoin Season DEAD? 😱 Tolstoy Would Rage! Bitget Exec Exposes Crypto Madness 😂

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In the grand tapestry of human folly, where markets rise and fall like the tides of some eternal sea, the stoic Vugar Usi Zade, operating chief of the exalted Bitget domain, hath decreed a lamentable absence of that fabled “altcoin season,” wherein cryptocurrencies deemed lesser than the majestic Bitcoin ascend as if by divine whim. Ah, but in these cynical days, traders, those restless souls fixated upon narrow whims or the singular glory of the golden calf called BTC, shall witness no such universal upliftment of assets minor in name and dubious in virtue. Sarcasm drips like honey from his words, for who believes in such pompous rises without cause? 😂

Thus spake he at the bustling conference of Token2049 in the distant isles of Singapore, on that fateful Wednesday, unto the scribes of CryptoMoon: “Verily, I hold no faith in an altseason,” declared he, his tone echoing the philosophers of old, pondering the absurdity of collective delusion.😜

“The antiquated notion that ‘lo, this is altseason… and every coin shall soar heavenward simply because the stars align,’ shall remain but a myth, and herein I stand resolute as the oak against the storm.”

“Nay, good sirs,” he continued, with a philosopher’s sigh heavy with irony, “we shall not behold that grand inflation of fortune, for there exists naught logical to propel it.” And why, pray tell, in this world of petty ambitions?

“Behold, no monumental advancements in the arcane arts of technology have emerged from these vaunted projects. No titans have sprung forth with innovations to stir the soul or sate the greed of man. Shall prices ascend merely because some mystical cycle hath ordained it? It doth not, I assure thee! 📉😉”

Yet, as in the annals of history, so went the altcoins-those tokens scorned as lesser kin to the primordial Bitcoin (BTC)-rallying in joyful communion with their elder. What is altcoin season but that poetic epoch when these audacious brethren surpass even the mighty BTC, driven by ratios of risk and reward that whisper of gambles both foolish and grand.

The epochs of crypto seasons fade, as Bitcoin divorces itself from the fray

Usi Zade, that wise observer of the market’s shifting sands, proclaimed that the crypto realm doth drift irrevocably from the quaint tradition of “seasons,” embracing instead fleeting cycles, brief as a lover’s sigh, for no longer doth the tide lift all boats in unison with the anointed one. Sarcasm abounds, for what is progress if not grand declension? 🇷🇺🤡

“Bitcoin ascends on its solitary path; its sway upon the lesser multitude is nigh unto zero,” he uttered, with the gravity of Tolstoy himself decrying the illusions of prosperity. “He hath severed bonds not merely from the stock exchanges of Wall Street, but likewise from its altcoin progeny.”

“We have witnessed thrice and more incidents where Bitcoin alone basks in the verdant glow of gains, while the whole market drowns in crimson depths. The rivers of capital flow not from BTC to the alts, oh vain hope! 😏”

Henceforth, these rallies-nay, seasons-of digital gold shall be forged upon the anvil of fashionable tales, with only those tokens entwined in the trending saga claiming the spoils, as Usi Zade foretold, his voice a blend of prophecy and jest.

“At present, we muse o’er RWA-those real-world assets shrouded in mystery-perchance a cohort of RWAs shall ride the wave, yet such ascent spreadeth not unto the wild yonder,” quoth he, with a chuckle born of sardonic wisdom. 😂💼

A metamorphosis of market mind, or the dire need for enduring altcoin spirits

Usi Zade lamented that the coin collectors of our era dwell in cycles as ephemeral as morning dew, rendering it nigh impossible for grand ventures to endure the long march of time, for the populace demands fruits of gold within a few moons, as if planting acorns and harvesting oaks in a fortnight. Humor lies in the absurdity, dost thou not see?

“Even the Amazonian empire required over a decade to yield profit, yet we compel our crypto spawn to flourish in eight mere months,” he expounded, echoing the moral critiques of yore. “This is the crux of woe, the very foundation upon which our market is built-nay, misbuilt! 👎📅”

In the realms of conventional commerce, he noted with keen sarcasm, investors oft relinquish their holdings to fresher purses when withdrawing, sustaining enterprises with vital fluids of capital. But in this distorted crypto mirror, “’tis quite the inversion,” for tokens are flung forthwith into the maw of the common trader.

“The token is a creature apart-a distinct commodity. One must cavort with the speculators, ensuring lively trade and steadfast prices; lest they plummet to oblivion, thy project, thy noble endeavor, perisheth utterly, and resurrection becometh a fable for the gullible. Thus spake Usi Zade, with a wink of eternal truth. ❤️‍🩹”

Bitcoin, the solitary sovereign, now the sole counsel for neophytes

In this evolving saga, Usi Zade revealed that sages of the crypto fraternity now advise fresh pilgrims to cling but to Bitcoin alone, forsaking the hoary mantra of a balanced ledger-seventy parts to the golden king and thirty to Ether (ETH), that once-eternal consort. 📈😐

“None whisper now of Bitcoin paired with Ethereum,” he declared, dripping with irony for the fickle winds of fortune. “All chant unison: merely Bitcoin.”

Moreover, Ether’s price hath grown as stable as an unyielding boulder compared to Bitcoin’s relentless ascent to zeniths anew, spanning nigh a year, leaving traders bereft of motive to partake in its quieter realm. Happy emoji for the win? Nah, let’s smirk. 😛

Yet, the dominion of Bitcoin and Ether hath wavered but little o’er the past annum, with BTC commanding a 58% share of the marketplace, ebbing from its peak of 65%, whilst ETH claims 12%, rising from abysmal lows of 7.3% in that far April, as per the chronicles of CoinMarketCap. 

Trade Secrets: Bitcoin to see ‘one more big thrust’ to $150K, ETH pressure builds

Additional reporting by Ciaran Lyons.

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2025-10-02 06:32