On January 5, several crypto publications claimed the US Department of Justice (DOJ), via the US Marshals Service (USMS), sold 57.55 BTC seized from Samourai Wallet founders. Naturally, this sparked existential dread about whether the universe is trying to mock us.
The news alleged this violated President Trump’s Executive Order 14233, which allegedly commands federal agencies to hoard forfeited Bitcoin as part of the US Strategic Bitcoin Reserve. (Because nothing says “national security” like a Bitcoin piggy bank, right?)
However, a quick glance at the blockchain-where truth is as rare as a polite cryptographer-reveals that while the BTC was shuffled into Coinbase Prime’s custody, the blockchain itself remains suspiciously silent about any actual sale. It’s like a bureaucratic black hole: nothing escapes, and everything is a mystery.
Understanding the On-Chain Data (Or Lack Thereof)
On November 3, 2025, 57.553 BTC was transferred from a bech32 address linked to the Samourai forfeiture to a Coinbase Prime Deposit wallet (3Lz5U). Moments later, the funds were swept into another Coinbase Prime Deposit wallet (1AaFQ). Such moves are standard operational behavior, akin to a custodial ballet where the only thing dancing is your patience.
Further analysis shows the BTC was consolidated into Coinbase Prime’s sprawling cluster of addresses-a digital equivalent of a bureaucratic labyrinth. At no point did the Bitcoin escape Coinbase’s grasp. It’s like a toddler with a toy: it moves around, but you’re never really sure if it’s been sold, retired, or just misplaced.
No On-Chain Evidence of a Sale (Yet)
The blockchain remains stubbornly mute on whether the Bitcoin was liquidated. There’s no evidence it:
- Moved to a non-Coinbase entity (unless the universe is playing a prank),
- Fragmented into trade execution outputs (which would be less chaotic than a room full of monkeys with crypto wallets),
- Flowed into exchange settlement wallets (unlikely, unless the Bitcoin is on vacation), or
- Was distributed in a sale pattern (which would require more coordination than a group of accountants at a rave).
A zero balance in the original Coinbase Prime address means nothing. It just proves Coinbase swept the funds like a custodial janitor with a broom and a sense of humor. Remember: Bitcoin-to-USD conversion on Coinbase Prime is an off-chain affair. The blockchain doesn’t care. It’s busy doing whatever it does in the dark.
Did the DOJ Violate Trump’s Bitcoin Reserve Order? 🤷♂️
Executive Order 14233 allegedly bars the sale of “Government BTC” in the US Strategic Bitcoin Reserve. But whether the Samourai BTC ever joined the Reserve is unclear. Proving a violation would require:
- Court-issued orders (which are as rare as a polite lawyer),
- USMS asset records (if such things exist, they’re probably stored in a cave with a dragon), or
- Coinbase documentation (unlikely, unless Coinbase has a time machine).
None of these are visible on-chain. The blockchain, like a toddler with a secret, tells us nothing useful.
The forfeited BTC is safely tucked into Coinbase Prime’s digital vault. But whether it was sold? The blockchain says: “Ask me again tomorrow.”
In the end, the question of DOJ compliance remains a bureaucratic riddle wrapped in a Bitcoin enigma. The universe is watching. It’s laughing. And it’s definitely not answering.
Read More
- El Salvador’s AI Revolution: Nvidia Chips Power National Lab
- Silver Rate Forecast
- Gold Rate Forecast
- Brent Oil Forecast
- Is Bitcoin Just Playing Hide-and-Seek with $100K? Spoiler: It’s Winning at Hide
- Safepal & Hyperliquid: 40x Leverage, No Safety Net!
- BTC AUD PREDICTION. BTC cryptocurrency
- Bitcoin Price Fluctuations: Will It Ever Stop Playing Peek-A-Boo?
- Elon Musk’s Dogecoin Shenanigans: Billionaire’s Meme or Market Mayhem?
- Astounding Crypto Revelations: Bitcoin’s Titanic Comeback? 🤔💰
2026-01-06 01:59