Oh, the drama! CNBC has joined forces with Kalshi, the prediction market that’s more reliable than your ex’s promises! 📺📈
Starting in 2026, CNBC will have real-time forecasts on “Squawk Box”-because nothing says “financial expertise” like predicting the future with a ticker that’s probably wrong. 🕒💸
Kalshi’s gonna have a CNBC-branded page-because nothing says “trustworthy” like a market that’s basically a casino with a degree. 🎲
Kalshi CEO Tarek Mansour says this is the “next evolution” of financial reporting-which, if you ask me, is just a fancy way of saying “we’re finally admitting we don’t know anything.” 🤯
CNBC president KC Sullivan says prediction markets are “important tools”-which is just code for “we’re desperate for new content.” 🎯
And just days later, Kalshi also partnered with CNN-because why have one media outlet when you can have two? 📺📺
Kalshi, founded in 2018, now has a $1 billion raise and a $11 billion valuation. Talk about a “next evolution”! 💸👶
Polymarket prediction market is also on the rise-because nothing says “success” like a blockchain-based prediction market. 🏋️♂️ blockchain!
Polymarket’s now the clearinghouse for DraftKings’ prediction bets-because who needs actual sports betting when you can predict the outcome? 🎯🎲
Polymarket partners with PrizePicks-because why not predict sports and entertainment while you’re at it? 🎮⚽
Polymarket becomes the official partner for UFC and boxing-because nothing says “excitement” like real-time forecasts during a fight. 🥊📈
Polymarket’s $10 billion valuation is just the beginning-soon, they’ll have a token. Because what’s a prediction market without a cryptocurrency? 🏦💸
Users are 99% sure Polymarket will launch in 2025-probably because they’re all in on the joke. 😂
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2025-12-05 01:07