In the hallowed halls of academia, where the scent of old books mingles with the rustle of $57 billion, Harvard University has taken a leap into the maelstrom of modern finance. One might imagine the ghosts of Newton and Darwin rolling their eyes as their alma mater, armed with a calculator and a ledger, boosted its stake in BlackRock’s Bitcoin ETF by 250% this quarter. Whether this is wisdom or folly… well, let us weep with glee. 🎓💰
The Harvard Management Company, that architectural marvel of fiscal conservatism, now owns 6.8 million shares of the iShares Bitcoin Trust ETF. At $442.8 million, one wonders if the university plans to replace its libraries with cryptocurrency miners. Or, perhaps, the next generation of dons will trade quills for quantum algorithms. 🕰️🪙
Earlier this year, Harvard’s August filing revealed a modest 1.9 million shares. Now? A ravenous 6.8 million. One can almost hear the administrators whispering, “Proceed with caution.” Or as a Cheshire cat might say, “If that’s all you’ve got… game on, baby.” 😏otypical.
The Bloomberg ETF analyst Eric Balchunas, that sage of stat counters, remarked that “it’s super rare/difficult to get an endowment to bite on an ETF.” For Tolstoy, this is less a comment on finance and more a revelation of human stubbornness. After all, what is “super rare” if not a metaphor for Harvard’s “small” 1% stake? The universe remains unchanged, but now IBMIT is the 16th-largest holder. A Pyrrhic victory? Or a camel’s back in the making? 🐪📉
Balchunas, ever the poet of spreadsheets, noted that endowments “are notably anti-ETF” and “the hardest institution to hook.” A woman’s poise in a debate? Not this. One might suppose Harvard’s financial team now answer to the title “The Chosen Ones.” 🙃🔋
But let us not judge. The beast that is Harvard’s portfolio now extends clawed hands to gold, tech, and fintech. Amazon, Meta, Microsoft, Alphabet-all their names glow like incantations in a capitalist grimoire. Even Klarna, that phantasm of “buy now, bleed later,” now shares a table with the likes of TSMC. A tale of two markets: gold and Bitcoin, where one shines and the other crashes. Like snowflakes versus meteorites. ❄️🚀
And gold? Alas, Harvard nearly doubled its hoard. 661,391 shares of SPDR Gold Shares. One imagines the capital-p purchasing “safety” like a child clutching a teddy bear. Or perhaps a collegiate equivalent: coupons for eternal wealth. 🤑🧸
Yet Bitcoin, that fickle lover of markets, has now fallen beneath $95k. The ETFs? They weep $1.11 billion of outflows, as if the gods of finance decreed it so. And Harvard, that mighty oak of academia, now sways in the storm. Will the leaves return? Only time, and the ledger books, shall tell. 🌪️💸
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2025-11-17 05:12