Why Are Banks Trying to Rob You of Free Money? 🤔💸

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So, here’s the deal: Coinbase is mad as heck that some banks want to ban you from getting free stuff-like cashback or discounts-when you pay with stablecoins. 🚫💸 They’re calling it “un-American,” which is rich considering banks basically invented the concept of “fees” out of thin air. 👏

Turns out, this feud revolves around the GENIUS Act, a law that says stablecoin issuers can’t hand out interest. But here’s the twist: it doesn’t say anything about crypto exchanges doing it. It’s like writing a rulebook that bans pineapple on pizza but forgets to mention anchovies. 🍕❓

Banks argue that if a third party gives you rewards, they’re “indirectly” involved. Coinbase’s Faryar Shirzad called this logic “sillier than a screen door on a submarine” in a post to X. 🚢🚪 He also asked regulators to “stick to the text,” which is code for “stop making stuff up.”

“There’s something un-American about bank lobbyists telling you what to do with your money. But hey, maybe they’ll start regulating which socks you wear too!”

Banks are sweating because stablecoins could drain over $6.6 trillion from their vaults. That’s like watching your life savings evaporate while they’re busy charging you $5 to check your balance. 💸

Stablecoins: The Bank Heist No One Saw Coming

Coinbase claims stablecoins could save merchants $180 billion in card fees. But banks? They’re holding up the “Not on my watch!” sign. 🚫 They’d rather you keep paying their “convenience fees” than let crypto crash their party. 🎉

“If you can’t get rewards for using stablecoins, why bother? Just keep using your 1998 Visa and enjoy those 0.5% cashback dreams.”

Exchanges Love Stablecoins (And Your Trading Fees)

Let’s not forget: Coinbase profits when stablecoins boom. They’re like the kid in class who sells lemonade during recess and suddenly owns a soda empire. 🍋💰 They even hand out credit cards with crypto rewards-because who doesn’t want free dogecoins for buying groceries? 🐕🛒

Shirzad insists banks can’t stop “innovation,” but we’ve heard that line before. Last time it was “horseless carriages” threatening the horse-and-buggy lobby. 🐴➡️🚗 Stay tuned!

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2025-11-14 06:06