Vitalik Buterin Declares Ethereum’s “Incorruptible” Secret – Spoiler: It’s Not Bitcoin! 😂

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In a stunning revelation that has left crypto maximalists clutching their pearls, Ethereum co-founder Vitalik Buterin has declared that the blockchain’s “most important” property is “incorruptibility.” One might assume this refers to resisting bribes, but no-apparently, it’s about resisting… well, nothing at all. 🤷‍♂️

The billionaire prodigy, who clearly has never been bribed by a bag of Bitcoin, has once again amplified his love for ZKSync, a project that somehow manages to sound both cutting-edge and suspiciously like a tech startup’s buzzword bingo card. ZK-rollups, he insists, are the future-because nothing says “revolutionary” like reducing gas fees and speeding up transactions. 🚀

The recent ZKSync Atlas upgrade, launched in October with all the fanfare of a tax audit, boasts a jaw-dropping 30,000 transactions per second (TPS). For context, that’s enough to process a coffee order faster than a barista’s exasperated sigh. ☕

Earlier this year, Buterin praised ZKSync for doing “a lot of underrated and valuable work,” a sentiment that could just as easily describe his own Twitter thread. 🧵

Is Ethereum Actually Incorruptible? Or Just Bad at Admitting Flaws?

Meanwhile, Bitcoin maximalist Samson Mow of JAN3, who seems to have a vendetta against anything that isn’t Bitcoin, argues that Ethereum’s incorruptibility is as credible as a house of cards built by a toddler. He points to Ethereum Classic (ETC), the original chain that refused to “save the DAO” in 2016-because nothing says “immutable” like rewriting history. 🔄

Other critics, perhaps nursing a cup of cold brew and a grudge, have taken issue with Ethereum’s “premine” (read: early investors getting a head start) and its lack of a supply cap. Oh, and the whole “abandoning proof-of-stake” thing. It’s like watching a reality TV show where everyone’s a villain. 🎭

A particularly astute commentator noted that Ethereum’s reliance on layer-2s is akin to building a fortress on a sandbar. “Ethereum L1 is practically incorruptible,” they said, “but L2s are still learning to tie their shoelaces. Until then, calling Ethereum ‘fully incorruptible’ is like calling a boat ‘unsinkable’-it’s not, and you’re probably going to drown.” 🛥️

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2025-11-02 12:23