Crypto’s Oct 10 Plunge: A Stress Test or a Party Pooper? 🤯💸

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Markets

What to know:

  • Matt Hougan blames a late-Friday tariff tantrum and $20 billion in leveraged positions getting “liquidated like a bad marriage.” Bitcoin dipped 15%, but even that’s less dramatic than my Auntie Mabel’s hairdo in ’83.
  • His “three questions” quiz checks if anything broke, if the plumbing held, and if investors behaved. Spoiler: DeFi venues survived; Binance refunded $400M-probably because they felt guilty, not because they care. 🐬
  • Nothing fundamental shattered, so the market will probably bounce back like a rubber chicken. 🐔

Crypto’s Oct 10 nosedive was less “apocalypse” and more “stress test with a side of chaos,” according to Bitwise CIO Matt Hougan. His memo? A masterclass in financial whodunits and crypto’s version of “the floor is lava” without anyone actually catching fire.

Hougan blames Trump’s late-Friday tariff threat-because nothing says “calm down” like a 100% tariff on Chinese goods. With equities closed, traders turned crypto into a dumping ground for panic. Leverage? It got liquidated like a library sale. $20B vanished-largest ever! Bitcoin dropped 15%, but even that’s less scary than a tax audit. 🕵️♂️

Bitcoin rebounded to $115k by Monday, while SOL briefly fell 40%. Imagine your savings doing that at a casino. But hey, at least it wasn’t a total collapse-just a very expensive nap.

Hougan then asked: “Did anything break?” Custodians and liquidity providers lost money but stayed upright. Hedge funds didn’t melt down-probably because they’re already made of money. 🏦

Next: Market plumbing. DeFi platforms like Uniswap and Aave kept chugging along, while centralized exchanges flapped like a demented goose. Binance later refunded $400M-generous, or just guilt-tripping? 🤔

Investor behavior? Hougan’s inbox was eerily quiet. Institutional clients sat still like a well-fed troll. Meanwhile, social media went feral. Turns out, calm investors save the day-proving that sometimes, doing nothing is the best move. 🧘♂️

No security breaches, no tech meltdowns, and no regulatory “gotchas.” So, crypto’s long-term plan? Still on track, thanks to clearer rules, institutional love, and stablecoins trying to become the world’s most useful cup of tea. ☕

Bitcoin’s up 21% YTD, and the Bitwise 10 index is up 22%. Near term? Thin liquidity ahead-expect wild swings until everyone remembers why they’re here. 🎢

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2025-10-15 15:16