MARA Mines BTC & AI Dreams 💰🤖 | The Bitcoin King’s New Empire!

Behold, dear spectators! Our hero Marathon Digital Holdings (MARA) hath swelled its Bitcoin coffers to a staggering 52,850 BTC-373 freshly minted coins in September alone! Valued at a paltry $6.4 billion, this hoard cements MARA as the unrivaled titan of public Bitcoin mining. Verily, their treasury outshines even the dragon’s gold of yore! 🐉

In September’s grand spectacle, MARA conjured 736 BTC ($88.6 million) from the digital ether-a 4.4% rise from August! This bounty claimed 5.2% of all block rewards, as the global hashrate soared like a caffeinated phoenix to 1,031 EH/s. Yet MARA, undaunted, secured 218 blocks (a 5% leap) while their Texan wind-powered lair hummed at 60.4 EH/s. Truly, they dance with hurricanes! 🌪️

– MARA (@MARA) October 3, 2025 🐦

Though Bitcoin flirted with a September slump, MARA emerged unscathed! BTC closed at $120,373-a 5.4% wink to the moon 🌕-briefly outshining August’s record near $125,000. One wonders if Satoshi’s ghost is buying popcorn for this circus. 🍿

Ranked second only to Michael Saylor’s “Strategy” (640,031 BTC, $77 billion), MARA now plots a Shakespearean twist: from Bitcoin blocks to AI infrastructure! 🎭

Act II: The AI Gambit 🤖

Last August, MARA plunked $168 million on Exaion-a French AI/HPC firm owned by EDF. With a 64% stake and a 2027 option to grab 75% for $127 million more, they’ve turned corporate poker into performance art. 🃏

Exaion, already cozy with Nvidia and Deloitte, crafts energy-efficient HPC centers. MARA’s bet? That miners shall evolve from blockchain guards to AI overlords. Imagine: Bitcoin treasuries funding Skynet! 🚀

By marrying $6B in BTC with AI dreams, MARA declares miners shall henceforth be “computational backbone” suppliers! Diversification, they say, is the spice of life-or perhaps a hedge against regulatory gremlins. 🧙♂️

Thus, the mining sector tiptoes toward utility-like respectability. Next act: quarterly earnings in iambic pentameter! 🎭

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2025-10-03 18:02