Scandalous Financiers! Bitget Unveils Ridiculous RWA Madness with TSLA, NVDA & CRCL 😂🔥

Heavens! Have you heard the latest folly from the venerable house of Bitget? Parbleu! In their insatiable hunger for novelty, they have unleashed upon this mortal coil a real-world asset index, coupling perpetual contracts with the illustrious personages known as Nvidia, Tesla, and-circle your wagons-Circle itself. Pardon the pun, but it appears finance is now a circus, and everyone’s invited! 🃏

  • Bitget, that most ambitious of merchants, has concocted a real-world assets index perpetuals for stocks of great renown.
  • Should your heart so desire, the contracts for Tesla, Nvidia, and Circle will let you wager with up to 10x leverage-because what good is risk without a dash of drama? The trading? 5×24, leaving only the sabbath for rest… and regret.

On the fateful date of August 20 (mark your almanacs), Bitget announced with all the subtlety of a street performer that traders may have fresh exposure to this delectable stew of tokenized traditional assets. The contract, it seems, joins tokenized stocks already flouncing about the marketplace. One wonders if the philosophers of finance envisioned such theatricality. 🎭

The index, for those who cannot resist temptation, offers you continuous exposure in a market open five days a week, twenty-four hours at a stretch-just what your insomnia ordered. Each index is composed of one or more RWA tokens, tracking prices as haphazardly as a carriage on Parisian cobblestones, across multiple third-party issuers. The future’s perpetual, the leverage ridiculous (up to 10x!), and the possibility of drama infinite.

#Bitget launches the industry’s first RWA Index Perpetual futures! 🚀

TSLA, NVDA, and CRCL RWA Index perpetual futures are now live with leverage of up to 10x.

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– Bitget (@bitgetglobal) August 20, 2025

Gracy Chen, that esteemed maîtresse of Bitget, was heard uttering words of supreme confidence, claiming this grand spectacle aligns with their master plan to push innovation across the crypto lands. Her pronouncement rang through the air: ‘We are slowly transitioning into a comprehensive ecosystem of all things finance.’ Imagine, dear reader, a realm in which the bridge between tradition and unbridled blockchain is sturdy enough for a whole company to dance across.

“With the world’s first RWA Index Perpetual Contract, we are slowly transitioning into a comprehensive ecosystem of all things finance. This product shows the platform’s advancement as compared to other players, as it enables traders with exposure to a modern and traditional range of asset classes, bridging the gap between TradFi and DeFi,” Chen added.

Do try not to sleep: RWA Index Schedules 5×24 Trading

Much like perpetual contracts served à la crypto, the RWA index might add or toss aside sources at a whim-market activity, trading volume, and liquidity conditions, those tempestuous moods of the exchanges, will decide the fate. Bitget, ruler of the hourly roost, will recalibrate index weighting whenever the muse of fairness (or chaos?) inspires.

And lo, Bitget will keep to their 5×24 schedule! Contracts will be shuttered on weekends and holidays, leaving traders bereft and possibly forced to endure a touch of real life. Prices will be frozen in stasis during market closures, the only liquidation being tears upon one’s pillow.

Yet, for those who cannot keep their hands idle, margin can be tossed in during closure-because what is a holiday without existential dread? Orders may be canceled, but alas, no new ones until the market awakens from its slumber.

To begin this theatrical run, Bitget’s pricing for the index borrows from tokenized stocks on the xStocks platform. Curtain up, wallets out! 🎬🤷‍♂️

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2025-08-20 19:26