Allow me to set the scene, old bean: TOKEN2049, Dubai. Sun blazing, camels possibly wandering about outside the conference hall, and inside, Pantera boss Dan Morehead holding forth like a stockbroker on his sixth espresso ☕.
Morehead, never one to mince words or apparently to resist the allure of a stonking metaphor, declared in the gravest of tones that Bitcoin and its digital chums are primed to flourish beneath Trump’s pro-crypto sun. According to Dan, executive orders are being hurled like confetti at a wedding, and America is eyeing a strategic Bitcoin reserve—because why stop at gold when you can have magic internet money as a national treasure? 🏦✨
“Markets have only gone up 35%—that’s scarcely more than a mild jog after Christmas pudding,” Dan mused, undoubtedly polishing his monocle. Pantera’s own Bitcoin fund, he claims, has historically delivered a titanic 85% annualized returns, making your average piggy bank look criminally under-muscled. “We’re still at ground level,” he proclaims, as if the Bitcoin rocketship hasn’t even left the launch pad.
Turning his considerable attention to traditional markets, Morehead compared them—rather unflatteringly—to creaky prizefighters well past their prime. Stocks up a paltry 8%? Bonds hiding under the bed in fear? Meanwhile, Bitcoin is sauntering along, up 50% year-on-year. Quite frankly, if stocks and bonds were dogs, they’d be the kind that just chewed up your favourite slippers and are pretending it wasn’t them.
“The equity risk premium is vanishing faster than cake at a children’s party,” he intoned. “If bond yields don’t leap up like startled gazelles, equities will be heading for a spot of bother.”
But, he assures us, crypto is the life-raft drifting serenely in a world of economic squalls ⛵. As the institutional behemoths finally cotton onto the charms of blockchain—and with Washington waving its pro-crypto pom-poms—Morehead reckons a tidal wave of capital will leave stuffy old Wall Street for the wild, exhilarating seas of crypto.
Hold onto your hats, everyone. Next stop: the moon. 🚀
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2025-05-15 04:48