
Dearest reader, allow me to disturb your ennui with fresh gossip from the cryptographic salons: CoinDesk Indices has deigned to unveil its latest tableau vivant of wins and woes within the CoinDesk 20 Index. One might say it’s the social register of digital assets, but with somewhat less tea and far more volatility.
At this most debonair hour, the CoinDesk 20 pirouettes at a princely 3138.72—up 6.0%, or 178.07, since the last bell tolled at 4 p.m. ET on Thursday. If only my stocks performed with such enthusiasm when I languish at afternoon tea.
Why, nineteen of these curious assets have discovered the upward escalator and are ascending with the fervor of a nouveau riche at a Mayfair ball. One imagines their pride.

As for the champions: Uniswap (UNI) preens with a 13.5% leap—surely the envy of every coin at the soirée 💃, whilst NEAR offers an 11.7% waltz of its own. Meanwhile, BCH is performing an interpretive dance of modest decline at -0.6%, and POL at +1.1% simply refuses both excitement and embarrassment—one suspects a lack of imagination 🤷.
The CoinDesk 20, darling, is a broad-based index: a cosmopolitan creature flitting from one platform to another like a mischievous debutante, its influence spreading from continent to continent—a veritable grand tour, if you will. If you wish to keep up, ensure your monocle is polished and your appetite for drama is insatiable.
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2025-05-09 16:56