HNT Avoids Jail! 😱 SEC Caves?!

So, this Solana (SOL)-based “decentralized wireless network” thingamajig, Helium (HNT), is apparently doing the cha-cha after the SEC, those lovely folks, dropped their little lawsuit. A lawsuit, mind you! Like anyone even understands what a “decentralized wireless network” actually is. Probably just another way to lose money. πŸ€·β€β™‚οΈ

According to a new thread on X, formerly known as Twitter (because who needs consistency?), the Helium team is bragging that the SEC gave up on accusing them of, get this, violating securities laws. Securities laws! As if anyone in crypto even knows what those are. πŸ™„

Turns out, Nova Labs, whoever they are, agreed to cough up $200,000 to the SEC. Just like that! Pocket change, really. They settled the accusation without admitting they did anything wrong, of course. Because admitting fault? In this economy? Never! πŸ™…β€β™‚οΈ

And get this, HNT rallied! Went from $2.62 to a whopping $3.03! Then, naturally, it went back down. Now it’s at $2.96, up almost 10%. So basically, a whole lot of nothing happened. But hey, gotta make it sound exciting, right? πŸ™„

The SEC, bless their hearts, originally filed the lawsuit in January, accusing Nova Labs of selling unregistered securities. Unregistered! Oh, the horror! As if anyone even registered their toaster these days. 🀣

β€œThe SEC has agreed to dismiss its unregistered securities claims with prejudice. Helium Hotspots and the distribution of HNT, MOBILE, and IOT through the Helium Network are not securities. It also means that the SEC cannot bring these charges against Helium again.” Translation: “We give up. Too much paperwork.”

Helium’s calling this a “landmark outcome” for the “digital assets industry” and “DePIN” technology. DePIN! Sounds like something you’d find in your grandma’s attic. Decentralized Physical Infrastructure Networks… whatever that means. Tokenizing real-world infrastructure? Just say “crypto scheme,” we’ll all understand. πŸ˜’

β€œThis landmark outcome is a pivotal turning point for the Helium community and the entire crypto industry, removing legal uncertainty for DePIN projects that use crypto incentives to build real-world infrastructure.

With the dismissal of the SEC’s unregistered securities claims with prejudice, the outcome establishes that selling hardware and distributing tokens for network growth does not automatically make them securities in the eyes of the SEC.” Translation: “We might be doing something shady, but now it’s probably legal.”

And guess what? This is just another lawsuit the SEC dropped against crypto this year, ever since President Trump took office. Seems like everyone’s getting off the hook! Kraken, Coinbase, Robinhood, OpenSea, MetaMask… What a joke! It’s a regular crypto fire sale! πŸ”₯

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2025-04-13 03:01