In the quaint little office of Metaplanet, Simon Gerovich, a man whose title sounds as grand as a czar’s, has just released a report that would make even the most stoic accountant chuckle. The year 2025 apparently brought with it a bounty that rivals the fabled fables of treasure hunters.
This past year, our dear company decided to hoard Bitcoin like a squirrel preparing for winter, mimicking the strategies of none other than the illustrious Michael Saylor. One must wonder if they were inspired by tales of kings and their gold-but alas, the kingdom is digital now.
Metaplanet’s 2025 Financial Results: A Comedy of Numbers
According to Mr. Gerovich’s tweet, which surely lit up the dreary social media landscape, thanks to Bitcoin, Metaplanet raked in a staggering 8.9 billion yen in revenue-a figure that represents a laughable 738% increase from the previous year. What a delightful surprise for the shareholders! One might say it’s easier to find a needle in a haystack than to achieve such a profit.
Morning Crypto Report: Europe Leads Ripple USD Activity on XRP Ledger, Dormant Ethereum Wallet With 6,335x Profit Fails 1 ETH Deposit, Solana Records $31 Million Weekly ETF Inflows Amid ‘Buoyant’ Sentiment
50 Million XRPs Sold in Less Than 24 Hours
By the end of December 2025, the company’s net assets ballooned to an eye-popping 458.59 billion yen-a surge of 2,603% YoY. If only my savings could grow at such a rate! And let’s not forget about Bitcoin yield, estimated at an impressive 568%. Perhaps we should all consider switching professions?
Metaplanet FY2025 Results
🟧 Revenue: ¥8.91b (+738% YoY)
🟧 Operating Profit: ¥6.29b (+1,695% YoY)
🟧 Net Assets: ¥458.59b (+2,603% YoY)
🟧 BTC Yield: 568%
🟧 Operating Margin: 70.6%FY2026 Forecasts:
🟧 Revenue: ¥16.00b (+80% YoY)
🟧 Operating Profit: ¥11.40b (+81%…– Simon Gerovich (@gerovich) February 16, 2026
Continuing his stand-up routine, Mr. Gerovich also forecasts that for 2026, revenues will soar to 16.00 billion yen (an additional 80% increase)-as if riding a financial rollercoaster! The anticipation is palpable, or perhaps it’s simply the sound of investors holding their breath.
And if that wasn’t enough, Metaplanet is still on a fundraising spree, raising a total of 21 billion yen to acquire more digital gold-because apparently, one can never have too much Bitcoin. It’s a bit like collecting stamps, except these stamps could buy you a small island.
Strategy Now Holds Roughly 714,664 Bitcoin
On Feb. 9, in a move that left many scratching their heads, Michael Saylor’s strategy acquired a jaw-dropping 1,142 BTC, shelling out around $90 million. That’s a lot of dough to be tossing around, isn’t it? It appears that they are committed to turning their convertible debt of roughly $6 billion into equities, which sounds rather ambitious-almost like a magician pulling a rabbit out of a hat.
Saylor even boasted that their Bitcoin stash could cover all debts, even if Bitcoin were to plummet to $8,000 per coin. At the time of writing, Bitcoin was gallivanting around at $68,943-a far cry from the depths of despair he painted.
Read More
- Gold Rate Forecast
- Silver Rate Forecast
- Discover the Hidden Gems: Altcoins Under $1 That Could Make You Rich! 💰
- When Crypto Flows Turn into a Billion-Dollar Flood 🌊💰
- FTX’s Billion-Dollar Circus: When Crypto Goes Rogue and Everyone’s Suing
- Brent Oil Forecast
- When Crypto Meets Geopolitics: A Week of Drama, Deals, and Ripple Rumors 🚀💰
- Shiba Inu’s Lucie Warns: Fakes Are Out to Get You! 🐕🦺
- Bitcoin’s Crazy Ride: Will It Hit $175K or Just Leave Us Laughing? 🤣🚀
- Crypto Drama: Sui’s Price Soars Like a Pigeon in a Storm! 🐦💸
2026-02-16 17:50